Do you believe in SRA, well its real!

Hi, I’d like to start by saying, I am a SRA survivor. SRA is real. Very very real. It happens all over the world. And it happened to me too. For 9 years I was part of a cult. A satanic cult. The cult was connected to the school I was in, a school for the blind. For years, we were abused. On a daily basis. We were taken to rituals by night. We were subjected to cruelty, torture, evil, pure evil. It was hell. But I survived. I am here, I survived it. There must have been a reason that I did. A reason my story needs to be told. I’m still trying to work out what that reason is.
This weekend is hard for many survivors. Halloween is one of the worst times of the year for SRA survivors. The cult really up the anti at halloween. They perform horrible rituals. Some of which leave animals and humans dead. They take all the fun and goodness out of halloween. Costumes, decorations, etc all become triggers.
Even now, years later, they still trigger me. Its all I can do this weekend to paint my face and dress up for the fun of it. But I am determined to do it. I am reclaiming the holiday if its the last thing I do. I am entitled to do it, for myself, but most importantly for the little parts of me whose childhood was so cruelly taken from them.
Will you help me? If you have any supportive messages that you think might help, I’d really appreciate them, and I think the child alters in our system would too.

Author: Carol anne

I am in my mid 40's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

29 thoughts on “Do you believe in SRA, well its real!”

  1. I would love to reblog this if that’s ok. I’m so glad you spoke out! 🙂 xxx I know how upset your children must be today and I’m here to give them all a huge cuddle ok xXXx

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      1. Yay! I’ve just reblogged. I think we could all work well together as a team. I have ambitions to make waves in the world of SRA! XXX

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  2. Reblogged this on SUMMER STARTS TO SHINE and commented:
    My SRA survivor friend explained this so well, so I had to reblog x SRA IS REAL. It happened to me, and her. Halloween is our worst time-please think of us and all the other souls out there just like us X

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    1. Hello to you both! I honestly did not know about SRA until today. I’m so glad that you are raising awareness about all these.. You are so strong, and I really admire you.

      I will be reading more information about this, and I hope it reaches a lot of other people as well.

      I just want to give you both big warm hugs for being so awesome and getting through everything you did.. but choosing to be here, now. ❤

      Stay strong! ❤

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      4. What an amazing comment-*feeling a happy warm glow right now* I’m proud of my survivorship and believe I was meant to be on this earth to talk publicly about this. 💖😊

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  3. hello my friend, I am sorry that you were abused in this way. I can’t imagine all that you went through. Just know that I am here whenever you need to talk. I have big ears (well not really but I am willing to listen). Your littles deserve to be loved and cared for. I am glad you are going out tonight to have fun. That is a huge step. I am proud of you. much love G

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  4. Yes Halloween is hell. For my little ones too. They are so scared, I am so scared. We do not participate as Christians we don’t. I will pray that the light will be stronger than darkness. We are going to watch a Christian Film. And I am fighting against the voices in my head who tell me I won’t survive it. As we are here we have survived it. Sometimes I can’t believe myself that SRA is real. But my therapist believes it and HE believes us. Sometimes I switch to younger parts who tell about the rituals and the abuse. Or I relive pain in flashbacks. In the end I know that the Holy Spirit in me is greater than the satanic cult. They got everything but not my soul, not my inmost being and thats what I think on Monday. They can destroy a life but only temporarily not for eternity. ….

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  5. Hi, I don’t normally do this or respond on this blog, but I thnk you are incredibly brave for trying to reclaim this holiday for th child parts inside of you. Now at halloween I think of my ex, who was also an SRA survivor, and how hard it was for him this time of year. Hang in there and keep doing what you’re doing. You can take the holiday back now. It doesn’t have to be theirs anymore. You are an adult now and you have choices now that you didn’t have back then.

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    1. Thank you for commenting. I appreciate your comment very much. Hell if I am going to let them make any more choices for me, I am not, I intend to claim this holiday back if it’s the last thing I have to do xxx

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  8. So you get to choose. You get to make these next couple days yours. Be present. Be the love you give. Be the kindness you give to others. Be the joy you receive. You get to choose what your mind will focus on. You are bright, playful and imaginative. You choose your thoughts. What will you choose to think about today?! What will you do in this moment?

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  9. You are a survivor, and you are strong. Reclaiming this holiday and making it your own is a very big, very important step! Especially for your little ones.
    Samhain blessings from me to you…I hope that you enjoy the day and the evening.
    gentle *HUGS* if allowed.
    🙂

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  10. I BELIEVE YOU. A dear friend of mine is an advocate and helping raise the issue here in Minnesota, especially for the sex trafficking around the Superbowl. I don’t know you, but feel fortunate you shared such a vulnerable story with me! G-ds best to you!

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