Things are a lot better for us today. A lot calmer. We had a terrific day. The weather here was beautiful today. I spent the day at my parents house out in their garden. Nitro was in his element, he really enjoyed being out in the garden running around. My sister came with the kids and we all had a fun time. Tomorrow mom and us and our sister and the kids are going to the beach and doing a BBQ on the beach. I’m looking forward to it. I’m also looking forward to a long walk on the beach, and a big 99 icecream cone on the way home. I promised the kids I’d get them an ice cream cone with a chocolate flake in it. The BBQ should be fun. We’re going to BBQ sausages. The weather for the rest of this weekend is supposed to be fabulous. Its my cousins birthday tomorrow, I got her a card and am giving her some money and a lottery ticket. Mom and me and my sister were going to go to my aunts today to drop her presents and cards off to her but then my sister was too tired so we never ended up going. My other aunt whose moms other sister called this evening and I spent some time chatting to her and mom which was cool. I’ve also been burning cd’s all day onto my computer. I am trying to rip all of my music and rip all of my movies and its going to take me forever lol. I have so many you see. My new dvd’s and cd’s i got on ebay havent arrived yet. I’m anxiously waiting for them to arrive. Maybe they’ll come on Monday. I hope you’ve all had a good day today. What are your plans for the weekend?
Fun question of the day for today…
what is your favourite donut filling?
mine is either custard, or chocolate and peanut butter! Mmmmm!
Do tell me yours!
well my plans sorta changed. i didnt end up staying at the basement club until 4 like I thought I would. Instead I decided to go to my parents tonight, and spend the weekend, despite my earlier reservations about not wanting to be around my dad. Mom said he was doing better so I decided to give him a chance. So far its proving to be the right thing that I did. He’s a little subdued, and hasnt moaned or lost patience with me all day so that is good at least. Mom was making stir fry for dinner but I didnt have any. I had eaten at the basement club. My sister came over too with the kids. Davin got his hair cut that was a huge deal. He hates getting it cut. he cried the whole time. but then once it was done he loved his new hair lol. i asked mom if she’d be available to take me to my two doctor appointments and she said she would so that is good at least i’ll have someone to take me. i still dont see why the doctor couldnt have just flushedd out my ears for me. it wouldnt have taken her that long. my ear actually feels a little bit better today, it feels like its unblocked a little. but i’ll still have them flushed out. my dad has a hospital apt on monday for a chest x-ray. then the following monday he has a bone density scan. my two apts are next wednesday for the ear flushing and monday the 26th for the blood pressure monitor. i plan on doing absolutely nothing this weekend. i’m going to be a totally lazy bum lol. i deserve a weekend where i can read, watch tv, chill out. the voice kids is coming on tv and i am dying to see it. i love singing shows like x factor and the voice. i suppose that is because i am passionate about singing. anyway the kids should be amazing i’m sure they will be. i feel glad i came to my parents tonight. i am happy i am not on my own. i realise now isolating isnt good for me. oh yeah before i forget, i got a great deal on ebay tonight! i sold an old cell phone it was a phone with talks software on it i sold it to a guy in the UK whose blind. so with the money i decided to go on ebay and see if i could get something. you’ll never guess what i snagged! a job lot of 100 cd’s and dvd’s, for 38 UK pounds! Thats a bargain if ever there was one. They are all brand new and sealed too. There are tons of movies in there for all ages so i think everyone in the system will be happy! another girl on an email list i am on sold me 16 disney dvd’s for 30 pounds, they are used but i dont care, and i dont think the kids will care either they will just be delighted to have movies! i kept it as a surprise because they love it when we get mail and well now i can tell them there is mail for them too! i also had my treat for the week today and i made an effort to include everyone in the treat so i bought us a chocolate and peanut butter filled donut! that was a huge hit let me tell ya. so yep its been a happy friday. i hope you all had a happy friday too. what one thing made you happy today?
I started a second blog where I will write about my weight loss journey. I’d love it if some of you guys would follow along and cheer me on as I try to lose the weight.
Weight and I have never been friends, I have battled with it my entire life.
Anyway, this new blog will have things like my food diary, work out entries, stats about what I weigh and losing the weight, etc.
So you can join me over at
well I never ended up going to the beach. The sun went away. Its overcast and cloudy now but still warm. But the beach would be cold. so my sister just dropped me and nitro home. and now we are just chilling out. this morning i walked to a local store with mom and i got myself plenty of fruit. i want to get back on my healthy eating kick again. less junk food, more fruit and veg. I’ve been neglecting it for a while. I really need to start pushing myself to exercise and exercise as much as i can and a couple of times a week. Iggie over at colour me bipolar has inspired me. She’s been working out and I admire her determination. So yeah, go iggie 🙂
i’m restless. i dont know why. i am also anxious. and i am not sure why that is either. i have no reason to feel anxious. i’m getting a break from the flashbacks. i havent had any this morning. i’m trying to figure out the trigger to my anxiety. the ward is so quiet. one of the other patients has the radio on. i am finding that comforting. its nice to listen to music as i work on my laptop. dinner time was hard going. i refused to eat anything. two nurses tried to get me to go down to the dining room. but i refused. i was sleeping and promptly went back to sleep. then about a half hour later one of the male nurses came in and said i had to eat something because i am diabetic. so he got me a yoghurt and a banana and i ate them. i wasnt trying to be difficult by not going to the dining room but i really hate the dinners. the food is always cold and its not nice either. the potatos are stodgy. the meat is not cooked to my liking. the vegetables are hard and not done the way i like them. so why go down if i dont even like the food? sure I could have had a yoghurt or some bread and cheese. but i dont know I was just in a mood and didnt want to eat. natasha came in after lunch and asked me if I’d eaten. i told her yes i ate a yoghurt and a banana and she said ok and left it at that. i rang my mom after lunch but she was just about to have her dinner and so didnt want to talk to me. it made me feel rejected so i promptly hung up on her. i felt sad that they were all eating a nice dinner in moms house and here i was stuck in the hospital with horrible food and no one to talk to. i rang back after about half an hour and we did talk. i felt sorry that i’d reacted so badly like a spoiled brat. so yeah thats where things are at this afternoon. i’m still in my pajamas. didnt even bother to get dressed today. just having a lazy sorta sunday.
the last 2 days were busy. the basement club had some activities on that i attended. yesterday wednesday we had an easter meal. 13 of us went to it. we got two courses, either a starter and main, or a main and dessert, for 20 euro. i had never been to the particular restaurant they were going to so it was all new to me. food was scrumptious. i got chicken wings for starter, and pizza for my main course. there was also an easter egg for each of us which was really nice. after we had all finished one of the other members offered to drive me home, so that saved money on a taxi fare. i fell into bed when i got home, because the night before i had woken up at 3 AM and hadnt been able to go back to sleep so ended up getting up then. tonight was the launch of our creative writing book. my mom and sister came with me. i thought we were gonna be late getting there because the traffic was crazy. but we got there with 15 minutes to spare. I brought nitro, but I really shouldnt have. I had to go sit up at the front because I was reading a poem. So I gave Nitro to my mom. And he had a panic attack. My mom and sister and a couple of the staff took turns taking him outside. I think he was panicking because he wasnt able to see me. The launch was very good. The reading went well. I wasnt able to record it unfortunately. there was food after the speeches and readings were over. we did not stay too long though because my sister had to get home to put her kids to bed. i enjoyed the night though and was very proud of the book.