What’s one word that describes your Saturday?
Don’t panic, at least, try noto.
This too shall pass. We will get through this pandemic. In a safe way, as long as we stay connected.
Connection, that’s what we all need. Someone to talk to, to help us feel ok when we aren’t. When we are panicking.
Stay strong, you will get through this. There will be an end to it.
I know it doesn’t seem that way now but honest we will all be ok, at least, that’s what I keep telling myself.
My advice to you is, have faith, stay strong, don’t panic.
Opening my back door
Breathing in the fresh early morning air
Breathe in an dout
Feels so good
soak in the feelings
I stand outside
So happy to be alive
So I am feeling so miserable right now. I have an awful headache. I suppose drinking coffee isnt helping it. Its more like tention in my head than an actual headache, but it hurts a lot.
Did I mention I hate headaches of any kind? Well I do.
Its at the front of my head, kinda at the sides too. Its a dull achy kinda pain, absolutely horrible.
I hope it isnt gonna last all night. I’m not up for that. And I dont wanna feel so sick, or vomit with it, so I am hoping I won’t.
Send positive vibes to me, I need them…
She called me! I wasnt expecting a call from her at all! I had postponed my apt, or I was thinking it would be postponed, when I said I didnt wanna go up to the clinic due to the coronavirus outbreak. But she called me! I didnt recognise her voice when she called, and she was like, hi carol anne? And I was like, whose this? I was surprised someone was calling me who knew my name! Then of course she’s like its me Dr. Barry, and I went, oh! Hi! Thanks for calling me! It was such a nice thing! So good to chat to her! She said they are doing most appointments via phone for now at least, but they may move to using zoom later on in the month, they are awaiting the technology from their employer. If they start using zoom, that will be 3 things that I am doing that are now using it. Therapy, slimming world, and dr. barry. Good thing I learned how to use it! We talked about working from home, and she encouraged me to do my work from just one room in my house, and then to have some wind down time afterwords, which I was doing anyway. She said its important for me to take care of me during all this, do a lot of self care stuff. I am taking next week off from working, as I’ve worked every day for the last 2 weeks, and its taxing, and overwhelming to listen to people being so anxious and upset and depressed. It doesnt make me feel any less anxious or fearful thats for sure. So I’ll take a week off next week, and Dr. Barry encouraged me to do that. We talked about the social worker contacting me, which happened recently. She’s helping me to try to get more PA hours. She’s a new social worker, so I dont know her and I told Dr. Barry I wasnt very open with her since I didnt know her. Dr. Barry told me she’d explained to her about me having did, and she told me to trust her, and that the new social worker is very thorough, and she did seem that way when I spoke to her last week. We talked a little about therapy, and about meds, and about my plans now for traveling. That was most of the appointment, she said she’d make another appointment for me for 2 weeks time, and that she’d phone me again, which I am so glad about. Its a bit weird not seeing her face to face. Even she said the same thing, she said its very weird doing it over the phone. Its actually the first time me and Dr. Barry have spoken on the phone. I’m just so touched that she decided not to postpone my appointment, and that she took it upon herself to call me, even though I’d said I’d be ok with postponing, I made that decision in a rush, and was sorry after I’d made it, but now I still had my appointment, which is great.
So I heard today that slimming world are organising for their consultants to run their groups via the zoom app, thank goodness I got familiar with it through my therapy sessions. We are going to use it to have conference calls, and there will be a reduced charge for them while we’re in lockdown from the coronavirus. We have to weigh ourselves at home, then text our weight into our consultant, so she can update the system, so that when we do return our weight and history will be there. This seems like a great idea to me. I’ve been struggling to stay accountible and to stay on plan. If this goes ahead it will be easier. We are going to trial it for 2 weeks, so for the first 2 weeks we can go on zoom and do the conference calls for free. This also seems like a good idea, to see if everyone is comfortable with the set up. I know I will be, so I said yes and signed up to it. I’ve told my friend Norma that she’s welcome to come over to my house, and weigh herself on my scales, and do the group chats with me since she’s not computer literate and she wouldnt be able to use zoom herself. She said she’d like to do that. I just need to get back on track. Go back to basics. I’ve started now. I am back on plan again, had wheetabix for breakfast, fruit and a sandwich for lunch, and I’ll be having chicken curry with rice for dinner today. From today onwards I need to be super good, and focused, that will be easy now since most take aways are shut. I dont feel so bad though, since even my consultant is struggling, and she admitted to eating all around her over the past few days. She said she knows when she weighs herself she’ll be up. I’m up a bit, but am hoping to lose it over this coming week, if I can go in next tuesday with a maintain or a loss I’ll be chuffed. Heres hoping…fingers crossed.
So I just got done watching a show on the casey anthony murder mystery, you know, she murdered her 2 year old daughter, and got away with it. I mean how she got away with it is beyond me, a jury should’ve found her guilty, but they didnt.
She was from Orlando, and in 2008 her 2 year old went missing, and for a month it wasnt reported, a whole month!
Then the family car was found and finally she was a suspect. They said in the show she was a liar, a compulsive liar, and she was a party girl, she hated having a child.
The theory was, that she medicated her little girl with xanax and chloroform, and drowned her in their swimming pool. Then she put the body in the trunk of the familys car and drove around for 5 days with the body in the car, before finally disposing of it in a wooded area a half mile from their home.
How could anyone be so evil! She was only 22 I believe when she did this to her child!
I’m stunned that a jury didnt convict her!
On the show you could just see how the prosecution attorney felt so bad for the little girl, she even said she felt like she’d let her down because no justice was served.
It was a good show. I hadnt even planned on watching it, I had planned on watching I survived, which is a show about people surviving horrific things, but that wasnt on tonight, and this true crime show was on instead!