G2k

I thought I’d participate in revenge of Eve’s challenge G2k for this week.

The rules:

Use the tag #g2k

Create a pingback to this post

Answer each question honestly

The questions:

  1. In what areas of your do you find it hard, to be honest with yourself?

I am least honest with myself in regards to my cutting, and other unhealthy coping strategies.

  1. Have you put in an effort to change this or do you ignore it in hopes it disappears? I try to change it. I work hard in therapy to try to come up with alternative coping skills to use.
  2. How does this affect other areas of your life? It causes me emotional turmoil and pain, it worries my family and friends, it causes me to lie to them and I also feel ashamed of the ways in which I have coped.
  3. Can you define the underline fear in regards to this? If so, explain. I worry if I give up my unhealthy coping techniques, I wont be able to cope with my emotions and thats probably more scarier to me than hurting myself or numbing my feelings.
  4. Do you find that you are more of an honest or dishonest person around others? I used to be dishonest but over the past few years that has changed, I now try to always be honest, because honesty is best, even if sometimes the truth hurts.

https://revengeofeveforeveranonymous.wordpress.com/2018/06/18/g2k-5/

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share your world june 18th 2018

See over at see’s photography is back with another share your world. This week I am participating in her challenge.
You can find it here:

http://ceenphotography.com/2018/06/18/share-your-world-june-18-2018/

The questions?

You can have an unlimited supply of one thing for the rest of your life, what is it? Sushi? Scotch Tape?

Books, definitely books, since I adore reading.

Teleportation or flying?

Flying! I love the buzz I get when I am up in an aeroplane! I dont like the ear popping, though.

Would you rather live where it only snows or the temperature never falls below 100 degrees?

I’d rather live where it is sunny. Because ya cant beat sunshine and it makes everyone really happy!

What did you appreciate or what made you smile this past week? Feel free to use a quote, a photo, a story, or even a combination.

Going to the beach with my family, losing some weight, spending time with my friends.

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busy day ahead

today I am going to be busy!
I havent slept tonight. probably becausei slept for hours yesterday after therapy. i cant expect to sleep at night if I am sleeping in the day. but it was ok, i did email, read, and listened to music while I wasnt sleeping.
this morning I have an apt to get my 3 monthly shot. its my trevicta shot. for those who dont know trevicta is invega an antipsychotic, but in a 3 monthly shot, I used to take a monthly shot until dr. barry said this would work better. and it has. I’ve had no side effects from it and I especially like that there is no weight gain on it.
so I have to go do that. It wont take me very long. I’m going to get a taxi there and have the taxi wait for me since I’ll only be five minutes in there.
in the afternoon I go volunteer at the cork city partnership. I’m not full time on friendly call. So I’ll be making calls and checking in on people. I love it. I’ll go there at around 1 PM and stay until 5.
Then I have to go to my friend normas house. We have a training session planned. Not sure yet what we’re going to be doing. But I promised her I’d come over this evening since I didnt do it at the weekend. I’ll stay for about 2 hours. I dont have to pay for a taxi to take me there, my taxi’s are payed for by the partnership, but I might get a lift from one of the staff at the partnership and then just get a taxi home.
I’ll be taking Nitro with me when I go volunteering and to normas house but I wont take him this morning whenI go to get my injection.
I just had an amazing hot shower. I was feeling a little anxious and a bit tense and it really helped with that. I feel all refreshed now. Im not dressed yet though. I just made myself some coffee and am drinking that.
Well thats about it for now. I hope you all have a great day today.
carol anne

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Goals for Tuesday

i have just a couple of goals for tuesday.
im taking it easy although from my schedule it seems like i wont be doing much taking it easy even though i feel like i sorta will.
anyway, my goals…

take meds
shower
go get my 3 monthly shot
eat a healthy breakfast, lunch and dinner
go volunteering
go visit my friend, and do some training with her
read a few chapters of my book
talk to my mom on the phone
make an appointment for nitro at the vets
exercise a little bit, maybe do the workout on my phone
have an early night if possible

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Get to know me! <3

I thought I’d do this I found it on another blog. I thought that it’d be fun to answer these and let you meet the girl behind therapy bits and get to know me a little more.

What are my strengths?
I am loyal, I love unconditionally, I have a good sense of humour, I am determined when I set my mind to something.
What are my short term goals?
Volunteer, get my 3 monthly shot, take nitro to get his vaccinations.
What are my long term goals?
Lose weight, Maybe start a new college course, Go on vacation, work hard in therapy.
who matters the most to me?
My family, my friends, my dog, my psychiatrist, my therapist.
What am I ashamed of?
Causing my family stress and worry, lying in the past to my partner and friends.
What do I like to do for fun?
Read, sing, knit, walk, swim, shop, hang out with friends or my dog.
What new activities am I willing to try?
I want to learn to bake, and crochet!
What am I worried about?
I’m worried about my dads health, my moms health, if I’ll stay healthy, death.
What are my values?
Humour, loyalty, independence, family time, friendship, belonging.
If I had one wish it would be?
To end mental health stigma!
Where do I feel the safest?
In my bed with my dog.
What or who gives me comfort?
My therapist, my mom, my friends, my psychiatrist.
If I was afraid I would?
Snuggle nitro, read, write or journal, call my mom or a friend.
What is my proudest accomplishment?
Getting a degree, training with my guide dog nitro.
Am I a night owl or early bird?
A nightowl, definitely.
What does my inner critic tell me?
You are a failure.
What do I do to show myself self care?
Take long showers and baths, read, talk to my friends, eat healthily.
Am I an introvert or an extravert?
I’m an extravert!
What am I passionate about?
Music, animal welfare, books, ending all kinds of abuse in the world, ending mental health stigma.
What do my dreams tell me?
That I’ve had a hard past.
What is my favourite non fiction book?
Will you love me or damaged by cathy glass.
What is my favourite fiction book?
dont have one dont read a lot of fiction as of yet.
What is my favourite movie?
Marley and me, annie, ghost, sister act, drop dead fred, and more.
What is my favourite band?
Evanesence, blue october, maroon five, pink, rihanna, katie perry, nikki minaj, eminem.
What is my favourite food?
Italian or mexican or chinese.
What is my favourite color?
pink all the way!
What am I grateful for?
My family, friends, guide dog, house, food to eat, my niece and nephew.
When I am feeling down I like to?
Write, shower, read, dance to music, cuddle nitro.
I know I am stressed when?
I have racing thoughts, I start to feel the anxiety building in my body, I start to catastrophise.

I hope you all enjoyed this I found it to be fun!
carol anne

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10 things I am thankful for

I thought I’d do a little gratitude list today. I like to do these every so often, it keeps me focused on what I am grateful for in my life. So here goes.

I am thankful for my guide dog, Nitro. He makes my life special.

I am thankful for my therapist Eileen. Her love and care for me make me feel valued and special.

I am thankful for a warm bed to sleep in.

I am thankful for enough food to eat every day.

I am thankful for my friends. My family.

I am thankful for my volunteer job.

I am thankful for my health.

I am thankful for my psychiatrist, whose expert advice I couldnt do without.

I am thankful that I can read, reading is knowledge.

I am thankful for my life, sometimes its hard and I dont feel like going on but I have people in my life who show me that life can be great, and I am so thankful for all of them.

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3 hours

thats how much sleep i got. i’m exhausted. i am definitely going to try to nap today at some point. i have to. i barely was able to get up. its almost 8 AM now. i had to really push myself to get out of bed. nitro needs to be fed and i need to book my taxi to go to therapy. i’ll be going to therapy at 9:30. for a 10 AM apt. i’m anxious about therapy. am looking forward to actually seeing eileen but just anxious about what is going to come up today. i think i’ll allow the kids to bring their new book and she can read it to them. and we can record it. that will be good. just still feeling quite emotional this morning. can feel liz’s emotional turmoil seeping through to some of the rest of us. liz is doing somewhat better, but she’s still not fully ok. i think fathers day triggered her more than she’s letting on. she doesnt really get along with our dad. she never has. when we were a teen they had a lot of clashes, their personalities are too similar. when i get home from therapy i think i’m going to read, and finish up my book. i have 9 chapters to read. there are 20 chapters, i’m now starting chapter 11. thats if i dont fall asleep while reading. anyway. better go on and ring to book my taxi. catch yall later.
carol anne

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