We were grocery shopping with our pa this morning! What an experience it was!
We went to the store, and we went during the 2 hour window that is set aside for elderly shoppers, or those who are vulnerable or disabled.
When we first went in we had to sanitise our hands, and there was disinfectant to wipe down the carts! We did that and then we went in, but there was a long line to go into the store to shop!
We finally got in there, and I got everything I needed.
I spent 100 euro! Now I have enough food to last me for 2 weeks! I am good to go! I certainly wont go hungry!
When we were done and on our way out to phone a taxi to go home, the lines were so long to get in, I said to my PA its a good thing we came when we did! There were two huge lines of people waiting to get in!
I certainly dont want to have to go through all that again unless I absolutely have to!
But I am grateful I was able to get everything on my list. I am also grateful for the store assistant who helped me find the vegetarian sausages, and I am grateful for the other store assistant who got me some change so that I could put it in the cart. Its 2 euro for a cart, but you get it back when your done shopping!
Some people are so helpful! I am glad to see that and it makes me smile!
SO AFTER WRITING THE LAST POST ABOUT BEING IN CRISIS, I WENT TO BED. I DIDNT TEXT EILEEN, I DECIDED I’D WAIT AND HANG TOUGH, SEE IF I WOULD BE ABLE TO RIDE IT OUT ON MY OWN. THANKFULLY I WAS ABLE TO, AND I AM GONNA EMAIL EILEEN THIS MORNING TO UPDATE HER. I KNOW SHE’S GONNA BE SO PROUD OF US FOR BEING ABLE TO GET THROUGH A TOUGH NIGHT ON OUR OWN. SHE’LL PROBABLY SAY I SHOULD’VE REACHED OUT, BUT TO BE HONEST, WE’D HAD A LOT OF CONTACT WITH HER ALREADY THIS WEEK, AND I WASNT SO SURE SHE’D APPRECIATE IT IF I TEXTED AGAIN IN CRISIS SO SOON. I KNOW YOU CANT HELP WHEN A CRISIS HITS, BUT I JUST DONT LIKE TO BOTHER HER TOO MUCH. EVEN THOUGH SHE’S TOLD ME ITS FINE, AND THAT I CAN ALWAYS TEXT OR EMAIL HER IF THE NEED ARISES. ANYWAY, I WENT TO BED, AT 8:30 AND I FELL INTO A DEEP SLEEP. IT WAS BLISS. I SLEPT FOR 5 HOURS AND WOKE UP FEELING WAY BETTER. MUCH BRIGHTER. I GOT UP AND LET NITRO OUT, HAD A SHOWER, MADE A COFFEE, AND AM NOW SITTING HERE READING EMAIL. THE CRISIS HAS PASSED…YAY. AM SO THRILLED. AND WE DIDNT SELF HARM. ANOTHER WIN. THIS MORNINGS GOING TO BE A BUSY ONE FOR US. OUR PA FRANCES COMES AT 9, AND WE GOTTA GO TO THE STORE TO BUY GROCERIES. I HAVENT BEEN TO A STORE SINCE ALL THIS SOCIAL DISTANCING STARTED, SO I AM A LITTLE APPREHENSIVE ABOUT GOING. I HEARD THEY’RE ONLY ALLOWING A COUPLE PEOPLE IN AT A TIME, AND YOU HAVE TO GET IN LINE IF YOU WANT TO GO IN. I DO NEED FOOD THOUGH SO I’LL BRAVE THE STORE. I’M GOING TO WALK THERE, ITS ABOUT A HALF HOUR FROM MY HOUSE. THE FRESH AIR WILL DO US GOOD. I’LL GET A TAXI HOME AFTERWORDS. I ALSO AM WORKING ON FRIENDLY CALL TODAY, WAS MEANT TO HAVE NEXT WEEK OFF OF WORK BUT NOW IT ISNT HAPPENING, I HAVE TO WORK AGAIN ALL 5 DAYS NEXT WEEK. AT LEAST ONCE I GET DONE TODAY I’LL HAVE THE WEEKEND OFF. I’M GOING TO FIND SOMETHING ON NETFLIX AND BINGE WATCH IT. ANYONE GOT ANY RECOMMENDATIONS FOR ME? OR SOMETHING ON AMAZON PRIME? I’M LOOKING FOR GOOD SHOWS TO WATCH, SO IF ANYONE HAS ANY LET ME KNOW. WELL THATS ABOUT IT FOR NOW….THANK YOU TO EVERYONE FOR THE SUPPORTIVE COMMENTS YOU LEFT FOR ME. WE ALL APPRECIATE THEM. YOU ALL ROCK!
So Eileen just called us! She said we’ve been on her mind a lot, and she wanted to know if we were free tomorrow to have a session then.
We jumped at the chance to do that!
She spoke to Allie too, because Allie had sent her a text to ask her if she was mad at us. Of course the answer was no!
So we’re going to see her tomorrow at 12:30 and we’ll have a good chat then!
Everything seems to be going good for us with our team all being so supportive and first today dr. barry rang us, and then eileen called us to fit us in even after we couldnt do our monday session!
I am so thankful to have such an amazing, incredible supportive team around me!
Eileen is just the best! I love that she thinks of us even outside of our session time with her.
We are incredibly lucky to have such an attuned therapist!
And Allie is happy now too and she’s stopped worrying!
Here in ireland our government is talking about putting the country into a complete lockdown, its being decided tomorrow what they will do. If we do go into lockdown, I’ve decided that I will go to my parents house for the foreseeable future, until this is all over. I am safer there. And it would be really difficult for me to get food, meds etc if we go into lockdown because my PA’S wouldnt be working, and I’d have nobody to go to the store for me or who could take me. The reason we have to go into lockdown is because this past weekend our beaches, public parks and walk ways were packed with people, people arent taking the social distancing seriously, they are treating the pandemic as if they wont catch the virus, and so why bother taking precautions? Its really selfish of them considering there are many vulnerable people, elderly people, sick people and people who need to avoid catching it at all costs. So this is why now our government is having an emergency meeting tomorrow to put a plan in place. God knows how long the lockdown will go on for when it starts, as our head of government said last week, this is a storm, it will come, and when it does we need to be ready. I am thankful I have somewhere safe to go. I am thankful I have my parents still. Its times like this when I know how lucky I am to have the support of family.
I am so anxious! I feel absolutely terrible!
I want to cancel my therapy session this morning! That’s not a good sign, as I almost never want to do that. I’m not gonna cancel it, but I really don’t feel up to having a session this morning.
However, I’ll push on through. I’ll tell Eileen how I am feeling. Maybe putting words on it is going to help me. I hope so!
I have 3 hours before the session. I need a cup of coffee and a good cry. I really feel like shit!
Is anyone around? Could use some support if you are!
I think the coronavirus is making everyone stay home!
I had my PA here this morning, and I had to go out to the ATM to get money, and then I had to go to aldi to do a little bit of grocery shopping. I decided to walk to the store and the ATM machine, its about a 15 minute walk from my house. The roads were deserted! There was one car came by when we were walking there. I took Nitro with me, he needed a walk. We got to the ATM and it wasnt working, but luckily there was another ATM nearby. So I did get my money in the end, which is a good thing as I owed my PA 25 euro because she’d brought me some stuff from another store. I got my few bits in aldi, and then we got a taxi back home. While we were in aldi, people were patting nitro and giving him lots of compliments. There were only a few people in aldi also. I didnt put Nitro’s harness on, so I was thinking maybe one of the store employees might say something to me about him being in the store, but they didnt say anything. He was really good, he was so calm, just walked calmly by my side. When we got home we unpacked the food, and then my PA did some housework for me. She vacumed, mopped the floors, did dishes, washed my bed covers, and wiped down all of my surfaces with a disinfectant spray that my dad made for me. I bought vegetarian sausage rolls, they had sage and onion stuffing in them and so I decided to cook two of those for an early lunch. They were delicious, I really enjoyed them and will definitely be buying them again. I didnt even know aldi carried them. It was only by accident that we saw them and I decided I’d try them out. My PA just left about 10 minutes ago, and now I’m going to start work soon. I’ll work for a couple of hours making calls. Then after that the day is my own. I’ll read, and watch tv and enjoy relaxing at home. I think we’re going to be on complete lockdown soon from the corona virus. My mom said she thinks the government is easing us into it. I dont know but it is looking likely that a complete shutdown will happen soon. Its just a matter of time as to when that is. My PA offered that if I need anything that I could phone her. I was very grateful to her for the offer. I will only do it if its absolutely necessary, as she doesnt drive. She said if I needed anything she’d get it to me somehow. I’ve decided I’m going to buy her a voucher and a box of chocolates for easter just as a little thank you to her for everything that she does for me. I know its her job, but she’s really good to me and I really appreciate it. She goes out of her way to do extra around my house. She also always makes sure I have what I need, she will sometimes pick up my meds, and she will buy stuff for me and bring it to me if I need her to do that. She wont see me stuck for anything. She deserves a voucher and a box of chocolates. Its nice to show your gratitude to people especially if they’ve made life a little easier for you. Well I think it is anyway.
My apt today with dr. barry was good. We discussed a lot. I was pleased with how it went. She never rushes me, today she spent at least a whole hour with me.
we talked about therapy, about the anger parts had been feeling. I also talked to her about my dad, about how he makes me feel, I dont usually discuss that at all, and in the past 2 weeks I’ve spoken to both eileen and dr. barry about it. Thats progress I’d say.
we talked about my sleep, and she told me to continue taking the fenergan if I am continuing to have bad sleep, I told her I’d slept good for the past few nights. But I know it wont last. It never does. She said the thing to do is to nip it in the bud when it starts, so, when I start sleeping badly, I need to start taking the fenergan right away for 5 to 7 nights in a row. Easier said than done, if you have things to do the next day then you cant take it, well I could, but I wont because I dont want to feel that awful grogginess that the fenergan brings on.
we talked about work, and I told her I am working from home now. She said she thinks it will only be a matter of time before we’re all told to self isolate and if that happens her clinics will obviously be effected. And we dont know for how long it will continue for once it is put in motion.
i asked her if she’d researched the med options and she said no. She said she’d been very busy and she hadnt had time. She apologised and said she’d do it this Friday since she’s had to cancel some family meetings. So she’ll have some time to sit down and read up on the different medications and on which ones we can try or should try for the PTSD.
I dont see her again now until the 25th of the month, that is if we arent all in quaranteen by then. We made another appointment for then and I hope we can keep it. I was pleased though with the way todays apt went. I came out of there feeling great. I felt validated and heard.