#JusJoJan prompt: busy!

I got busy tonight exercising! I decided to just go for it! Get on that treadmill and go go go!

So that’s exactly what I did!

I did a 15 minute intensive workout, and man was I hot after it!

But I felt great! It got my blood pumping!

My hope is that I can exercise every day this week. That’s the goal anyway. Whether I’ll actually accomplish it or not remains to be seen.

It definitely helped with my anxiety though to get on the treadmill! I pounded it and was able to release some of my anxious feelings!

I’m so happy now that I actually did that. Feels fantastic!

Daily Prompt – JusJoJan the 26th, 2020

Goals for 2020


So this morning, I met with my mentor. We worked on goal setting, and here are the goals I’ve set myself for 2020. I’ve set quite a few of them. I am looking forward to achieving them all if I can!

  • To lose another 2 stone by January next year
  • To be fitter and take up running
  • To have lower, more manageable levels of anxiety
  • To disassociate less frequently
  • To improve internal communication with my alters
  • To have and maintain a stable improved mood
  • To have positive self-esteem and self confidence
  • To further resolve trauma and build my resilience
  • To improve my singing skills and confidence
  • To practice yoga
  • To have a successful holiday to Colorado
  • To have better independence in mobility
  • To join a hobby group to socialise with
  • To continue volunteering with Friendly Call
  • To find suitable employment

Update on mom

My mom is doing a little better, but she has a long way to go. The infection she has is really bad.

She’s still taking the course of steroids and lots of different inhalers, plus, the doctor also gave her special nebules for her nebuliser with ventolin plus something else in them.

She’s exhausted from her cough, she’s been coughing like crazy all weekend, and she said she feels totally drained from it.

This morning, she was vacuming the bedroom that I slept in, and I had Nitro in there with me, and he’s moulting like crazy so there was a ton of dog hair everywhere. She told me she really struggled to do it, and she wouldnt ask my dad to do it since she says he doesnt vacume the way she does.

I feel that over the last few months her COPD has gotten a lot worse. She’s just not able to do as much now as she used to be able to do.

She even told my sister a few days ago that she wouldnt be going camping with her in the summer, as she feels she isnt up to it any longer.

I know her COPD is incurable, and wont get any better, but the fact she’s slowly worsening over time worries me.

I guess all I can do is make life easier for her where I can. I told her that if it was too much that I can stay home on the weekends and just call to my parents house for a few hours on a Saturday and Sunday afternoon, and that I’m perfectly ok with that.

For now she said it was ok for me to keep staying there on the weekend if I wanted to. We’ll see, as I may not. I dont know yet. I’m just unsure of what I’ll do. I’ll think on it over the next few days.

Prayers for my mom

Can you all send my mom some positive juju and prayers?

She’s really sick. As you know, she has COPD, well, at the moment she has a very bad chest infection.

She also has a bad ear infection.

She went to the doctor yesterday and he gave her loads of meds, antibiotics, drops for her ear, stuff to put in her nebuliser, and steroids.

Its just gone 4 AM now and she’s been up since 3:15. She cant lie down as she cant breathe when she lays down.

I’m worried about her. Some supportive prayers and thoughts for her recovery would be much appreciated by me.

Check in with our CPN Sarah!

Yesterday afternoon, our CPN Sarah called. Dr. Barry had made a referral, and asked her to call us over christmas, to check in with us and see how we’re doing. She called yesterday at around 1 O’clock. I wasnt sure when she’d be calling. I missed her first call, as I was at the grocery store with mom, but luckily she called back. I knew it was her when I saw the missed call, as it was a call from a blocked number, and her number is private. At first I thought she wasnt going to phone back, and that maybe she’d wait for another day to call. But she did, and we had a long chat which was really good.

We talked about christmas and how we’d gotten through it. She asked me where I was, and I told her I was at my parents house, and that I was going to be there until the new year. We talked about my sleep, and I told her its still really hit and miss. I’ve been sleeping some, but that I’m taking sleep where I can get it. The night before last, I only slept for 2.5 hours. She asked me if I find the days very long when I am only sleeping for that length of time. I said that I did.

We talked about my weight loss and she congradulated me on that. She said I have great determination lol not sure if thats true, as I ate dessert again yesterday. I’m not so sure I’ll be down at weigh in this monday but we’ll see. She said she doesnt know of anyone who loses weight over christmas like I did. I told her I am going to get serious about exercising in january.

She asked me before she hung up if I needed another call before the sixth, the sixth is when I see dr. barry. I said no, that I thought I’d be ok. I have Eileen, and if I need a check in I can text her. I know Sarah would have called me too if I needed her to. I am thankful for Dr. Barry putting the referral in, because it was good to have as much support at christmas as possible.

I like Sarah, she’s really easy to talk to. When we were talking about exercising more, she told me that in order for her to exercise, she has to pay to go to classes, or otherwise she just wont do it. Her telling me that about herself, made me feel not so bad, that I didnt have any motivation to exercise much this past year. I didnt feel so alone, knowing that even my CPN wont exercise given half a chance.

Her telling me some stuff like that about herself, made me feel somehow closer to her, and I like that I was able to connect with her in that way. It was so nice to feel that connection to her in that way.

So I am glad we had a check in. It made my day much brighter. It helped me to stay grounded, and to get through the post christmas blues a little easier.