Its heading for 3 AM. I am wide awake. Havent slept at all tonight. Sigh. this sucks. I wish I could sleep. I am wired. Totally and utterly wired and agitated. I am jittery and feeling kinda anci too.
Am wondering how I’ll get through the day today on no sleep. I’m sure by the time 5 PM comes I’ll crash really hard.
Is anyone up? Could use a friend and a chat.
So I didnt go volunteering this afternoon.
I had a headache. So decided to stay home and rest. I napped for 2 hours. The nap did me the power of good.
I feel so much better now that I napped. I felt bad for canceling at the last minute, but I really couldnt help it. My supervisor understood.
Sometimes you just need to rest up when you dont feel good.
I’m never out so it was really a one off for me to not go.
so I got a great nights sleep! couldn’t believe it!
went to bed at around 11 PM last night. fell asleep right away!
I honestly didn’t think I’d sleep at all! I was wired before I went to bed! And I hadn’t even had any caffeine!
But thankfully it all worked out, and because I slept so well I was able to get up at 7:30 this morning, I jumped out of bed!
Therapy in an hour. Am wondering how todays session will go. I’m sure it will be ok. I’m a little apprehensive though about it.
This morning I am thankful for a good nights sleep. I am thankful for a nice big bowl of porridge to warm me up. And I am thankful that I am going to see Eileen soon.
Scared to sleep
Scared of bad dreams
Scared of just everything
Dont dare make a sound
Fearful of so much
Its so, so tough
Wanting to forget
Fall into a deep sleep
Your very existence
As the clock ticks
You just sit
Wonder when will you ever fall asleep…
Saturday. I am feeling good. I woke up late today. Well when I say late it was just gone 9 AM. But thats late for me. Im usually up earlier than that.
I’m off to the gym in a little while. I plan on just doing the treadmill and the bike when there. Im leaving the weights alone today, as mom doesnt know how to set them up.
My niece stayed in mom and dads last night. You wouldnt even know she’s there. She’s so quiet. All she does is go on her ipad. Play games on there. She did go for a walk with my dad and the dogs this morning though. She’s 10.
Mood wise today we’re doing ok. We decided the best thing to do last night was have an early night. We started feeling anxious and kinda agitated, so we went to bed and tried to sleep. At first we werent able to fall asleep easily. Nitro was really unsettled. He was panting a lot and whimpering and I wasnt sure why.
Eventually he settled though. Thank goodness.
Well thats about it for this mornings update. Am off to check my email now. Catch ya’ll later!
6:20 AM. I am up. i woke at around 5:30. I was so tired last night when I came home from slimming world. I ate dinner and then I fell into bed. I had turned on my heating to warm up the house. I fell asleep with the heat on thats how tired I was. Woke up around 2 AM and was roasted, so turned it off. Was then able to go straight back to sleep. My phone dinging didnt even wake me up!
I am going to the basement club this morning. I will spend the day in there. I am hosting lunch from 1-2 with my friend denise. So thats my plan for today. I’ll probably go in around 9:30.
Happy thursday everyone!
eyes wide open
heart beats wildly in my chest
middle of the night
a pounding heart
as i try
not to remember
bad dreams they suck
so so much
going over in my head
i fear, i dread
what will happen
if I allow my mind
to go there?
or should I
and just do it
Let my mind take me
Take me back
to that place
no! No! I shouldnt!
Ok, I tell myself…
try to breathe
and try to go back to sleep
tomorrow, things will look different