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STRUGGLING TONIGHT

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Carol anne

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IM REALLY STRUGGLING TONIGHT. WE WENT TO OUR FRIENDS HOUSE, AND CAROL ANNE TRAINED HER FOR A FEW HOURS IN HOW TO USE HER I PHONE. I WATCHED A LITTLE AND TRIED TO DISTRACT MY MIND FROM MY THOUGHTS.

I’M HAVING A LOT OF INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS. IT FEELS SO LONELY. DOES ANYONE ELSE SUFFER FROM INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS? I FEEL SO LOST AND ALONE.

I’M WORRIED ABOUT MAY 1ST. ITS A BAD DATE FOR ME, LOTS OF ABUSE MEMORIES, ESPECIALLY MEMORIES TO DO WITH MY RITUALISTIC ABUSE HISTORY. I DONT KNOW HOW I’LL COPE WITH THEM.

I WISH MAY 1ST WOULD JUST NOT COME AT ALL. NO POINT TO WISHING THAT THOUGH, IT WILL BE HERE WHETHER I LIKE IT OR NOT.

FREAKING OUT A LITTLE ABOUT IT THOUGH TONIGHT. OVERTHINKING EVERYTHING I KNOW BUT I CANT HELP IT.

ANYONE GOT ANY IDEAS OF HOW TO STOP RACING THOUGHTS?

LIZ

32 responses to “STRUGGLING TONIGHT”

  1. socialworkerangela Avatar
    socialworkerangela

    I have intrusive thoughts too I try distraction like music just an idea hugs

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    1. manyofus1980 Avatar
      manyofus1980

      THANKS ANGELA! ALL IDEAS ARE WELCOMED! XXX HUGS LIZ

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  2. Donnalee Avatar
    Donnalee

    Yeah, liz, sorry it’s hard. I substitute other thoughts–like with any addiction, you know? If I obsess about something, then I read something else, look at something else, say affirmations over and over like this is fine, this is getting better, I am free from this, over and over. In our house, actually, we do not have a certain night of the week, since someone here had a lot of abuse that day, so even on that night, I say that I’m tucking the person in for a nice Thursday night or whatever sleep, when it’s really the ‘bad’ night, and the littles ask about it, and I tell them, yes, it’s the good night, and they accept it and feel better. maybe you can just fkkin skip May 1 from now on–make your own leap years!

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    1. manyofus1980 Avatar
      manyofus1980

      LOL NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT! MAYBEI JUST WILL DO THAT! SOUNDS GOOD TO ME! XXX LIZ

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  3. violaetcetera Avatar
    violaetcetera

    I suffer from intrusive thoughts, too. They are a bitch. Take one breath after the other, THIS TOO WILL PASS.

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    1. manyofus1980 Avatar
      manyofus1980

      THANKS HUN I HATE THEM I HOPE THEY’LL PASS IM STILL GETTING THEM 😦 ANNOYING XXX LIZ

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  4. BeckiesMentalMess.wordpress.com Avatar
    BeckiesMentalMess.wordpress.com

    I’m also suffering from intrusive thoughts quite a bit all week. I’ve been listening to soothing music to calm me, or at least calm me down. I’m also catching up on a lot of blog posts, and that is helping get my mind off things. I do hope you feel better real soon, Liz. Just try to relax as best you can. 🙂

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    1. manyofus1980 Avatar
      manyofus1980

      THANKS, BECKY. THATS WHAT I AM DOING, IS CATCHING UP ON BLOG POSTS. LOVE DOING THAT. IT HELPS A LOT. LIZ

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  5. ashleyleia Avatar
    ashleyleia

    Maybe you could write an email to Eileen about the thoughts, even if you don’t necessarily want to send it to her. xoxo

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    1. manyofus1980 Avatar
      manyofus1980

      I DID THAT. THANKS ASHLEY. THAT DID HELP. AND I DID SEND IT. XXX

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  6. Bee Halton Avatar
    Bee Halton

    Just sending you a hug. I have them but haven’t found a way around them. But I think the idea with music that others wrote is a good one.

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    1. manyofus1980 Avatar
      manyofus1980

      YEAH, I THOUGHT SO TOO. SORRY YOU HAVE THEM TOO BEE. XXX

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Bee Halton Avatar
        Bee Halton

        It’s just part of our condition I think. They are thoughts, it’s not us and once we figure that there is a way to keep them at bay it will be easier. Just because it looks like they are more powerful than us doesn’t mean it is the truth!

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      2. manyofus1980 Avatar
        manyofus1980

        THANKS BEE! I NEEDED TO HEAR THIS! XXX LIZ

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      3. Bee Halton Avatar
        Bee Halton

        😚 you are a string young lady. You can do it!

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      4. manyofus1980 Avatar
        manyofus1980

        THANK YOU BEE! LOVE TO YOU! XXX

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      5. Bee Halton Avatar
        Bee Halton

        Thanks a lot. I meant “strong” lady by the way… 😚

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      6. manyofus1980 Avatar
        manyofus1980

        YUP I KINDA KNEW THAT…LOL…LIZ XXX

        Liked by 1 person

      7. Bee Halton Avatar
        Bee Halton

        I am training to become an English teacher for English as a Second Language. I have to start correcting myself 😉

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      8. manyofus1980 Avatar
        manyofus1980

        OH ARE YOU? WOW! VERY COOL! THATS AMAZING…

        Liked by 1 person

      9. Bee Halton Avatar
        Bee Halton

        I am working on it 🙂 Thanks!

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      10. manyofus1980 Avatar
        manyofus1980

        NO WORRIES! HOPE YOU GET THERE HUN XOXOX

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      11. Bee Halton Avatar
        Bee Halton

        Thanks 😚

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      12. manyofus1980 Avatar
        manyofus1980

        XXXX UR WELCOME HUN

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  7. whatifweallcared Avatar
    whatifweallcared

    I have intrusive thoughts also. . . takes a lot of prayer and blocking it out . . someday I want to be set where I can pull it out bit by bit, examine it all thoroughly, cry till I’m done and then move On

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    1. manyofus1980 Avatar
      manyofus1980

      SOUNDS GOOD! HOPE YOU CAN DO IT SOME DAY! XX

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      1. whatifweallcared Avatar
        whatifweallcared

        I will . . in time . .

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      2. manyofus1980 Avatar
        manyofus1980

        GREAT! SO WILL I, I HOPE. XXX

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      3. whatifweallcared Avatar
        whatifweallcared

        😊

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      4. manyofus1980 Avatar
        manyofus1980

        😀 😛 🙂

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  8. ajourneyinbothstrengthandweakness Avatar
    ajourneyinbothstrengthandweakness

    i have found that night time is when all the horrible thoughts come in. the reason being is, it gets quiet, you are settling down from the day. your mind has been busy all day with “distractions” and when it comes to night time, there are no more distractions there is only your thoughts. music, tv and reading are possible ideas to distract yourself whilst you get tired. the mind is a very powerful thing, do not give it that power. remember you are strong.

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    1. manyofus1980 Avatar
      manyofus1980

      I AGREE. ITS SO EASY TO STAY DISTRACTED DURING THE DAY. XX

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      Reply

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Thank you for reading, liking, and commenting to my posts.  It is very appreciated.

I am currently raising money to pay for ongoing psychotherapy. I am a survivor of complex trauma, I have dissociative identity disorder, and complex PTSD.  Therapy can be very expensive.

If you feel like donating to my fund you can donate using pay pal. My pay pal email for donating is:

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Don’t feel you have to, there is no pressure, but I’m grateful for any donations that are received.

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