I am not better off left to my own devices. My mind is weaving in an out. I’m thinking of every bad thing I have ever done and beating myself up over it. I really have to learn how to get along with myself. I used to be so independent. Now, not so much. I get by, I go through the motions, I do what needs to be done. But it hurts. And I don’t know if it hurts because I’m used to being taken care of or if it is because I have grown soft or if it is because of my illness.
I have turned into a needy person. I didn’t use to be that way. I was very happy being alone when I was alone. Preferred it even.
I dunno. I’m just very disappointed in myself.

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