Heartbreak

my heart is breaking
into a million pieces
will I ever heal?

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i feel icky

it taylor
i be feel ick
i am soo skard
i hearin voises
mean mean voises
they in my head
i cant get away frum them
i jus want them to leave me alon
im mad and sad and skard
thay tellin me bad fings
bad fings to do to my body
and that im stupid
and no good and ugly
and i shuld kill tha bodee
its so skary
i wish i can talk to eileen
but i cant cuz it nite time
shes in bed
so tha bigs tol me to rit here to all of you guys
so dat wat i am doin
hi eferon
im taylor or taytay
im six
and tonite i am skard of the voises
taylor

erika

im erika and im 7
i like care bears
and i am darinas best frend
we hang out with each other inside all the time
she protects me
cuz im always sad and so anxious
i feelin sad now too
sad and scared
dont kno why tho
my tumy hurts tho
i feelin lik i wana fro up
erika 7

words hurt us

“i dont know why your being assessed”
“there is nothing wrong with you”
“your wasting peoples time and money”
“you are not sikck”
“you must love going to doctors”

all spoken by our dad. words hurt. my heart is empty and heavy. the grief is weighing heavily on my heart tonight.

i wanted mom to go to our assessment on friday. i wanted it so bad. i wanted her to go to support us.

but she said no. a firm no.

“why would i go”

“your being assessed, not me”
“I have no business being there”

“its pointless me going”

nothing about i know its hard so I’ll go to support you. it fucking hurts.

?