I woke up feeling bla. I just feel off. I don’t know why! I just woke up numb, then I went from feeling numb to just feeling down. Now I feel so depressed. I cant shake it. I think I need to do something to distract. I ate a banana, and drank 2 cups of tea. I was hoping the tea would make me feel better. It didn’t. Thank god I have therapy tomorrow. I badly need it.
I’ve been up since the crack of dawn! I got up at 6 to get started on my college work. And I’m happy to say that now its all done! Well the article review I had to do is done. I still have to write out my notes for my presentation, but I am not going to do that today. I feel accomplished now that I’ve gotten the article review done. That was tough. I chose to do it on WRAP, and the recovery model. It was an interesting article. Not too technical so that was good. I got it done in an hour, once I started it, I was done by 9:30. I was reading a book for a while in bed before I actually started it. I finished up one child, by torey hayden, it was a really great read. I thoroughly enjoyed the book. Now I can chill for the rest of the day. The weather is really bad, its very windy and its raining. The forecast is predicting rain and wind for the whole day. My friend Norma had called me, asked me to come over, but I told her that I wasnt going out in the bad weather, but that I’d come over on Monday if the weather picks up. I started watching a true crime series called 21st century serial killers, its really good. Well I’ve only watched episode 1 of the first season, but I liked it. Now I have made some tea and I am going to do a little blog reading for a while.
Happy Friday everyone! I am so delighted its almost the weekend! I love my weekends!
Although this one will be filled with doing college work!
I have an article review to do! Igts a review of an academic article which has to be 800 words in length.
I also have to sort out my presentation! I will be presenting on schizophrenia next week in class. I am so nervous!
I am going to do it all on Saturday. The weather is meant to be bad this weekend so it will be good that I am staying indoors and getting my work done.
Mom and her sisters are supposed to go out tonight for dinks, I was going to go with them, but I’ve decided now that I wont. I wouldnt be drinking if I did, and if I did I’d have to leave Nitro alone for a long time, about 5 or 6 hours, and I dont want to do that.
My PA is going to be here in an hour. The storm has passed, its not raining or windy outside, so I am going to walk to the ATM get my money out, and I am also going to go to the gym.
I havent been to the gym in a while. I want to start going again. I gained about 2 pounds while I was away. I need to lose that and some more on top of it by next week for my weigh in.
I am also going to go volunteering today. I will get in touch with my supervisor later and I will go in after lunch. I am looking forward to it.
I hope you all have a great friday!
We’re having bad windy weather tonight. Its beginning to get really bad now. Whipping up a storm!
I am glad to be inside. I am glad me and Nitro are both safe indoors. Its almost midnight, but I cant settle down. I cant seem to get my brain to shut off.
I made a mug of hot chocolate, I’m going to go read my book soon. Wind down for the night I hope.
I just hope the wind doesnt keep me up all night! Its supposed to rain during the night too. I’m a little bummed about that. I was going to walk to the gym tomorrow morning and also walk to the ATM to get my money for the week, but it looks like that wont be happening now.
Eileen is so amazing. She has been so supportive to us while we were in the UK.
She said before I went that I could text her. So I did. I texted her on Sunday night, before I went to bed. I told her about how much I was struggling. I wasnt looking for a response, I was basically just sending her an update.
On monday morning, the day of the funeral, she texted me a sweet message, saying that she knew I was on route to the funeral now, but that she was sending me her love and support, and telling me that if I needed to talk to her to call her, that she’d be available at 10 Pm that evening, as she was teaching a class that evening.
I was so grateful for that supportive message. I read it when I got back to the afters of the funeral. I was so touched by her sweet message, I felt so cared for by her.
And we did talk that evening. I rang her and we talked about the day. She was still in college when I rang, but she still took my call, we talked for about 15 minutes.
She told me to try to practice self care, and to take good care, and if I needed to to just send her another message, but I didnt have to do that. I figured I could wait until I saw her to talk to her.
I feel so blessed to have such an incredibly caring therapist. She really is such a sweetheart to do all that she does for us. We appreciate her so, so much.
Staying positive doesn’t mean you have to be happy all the time. It means that even on hard days you know that there are better ones coming.
So we’re home! Got home about half an hour ago. Our flight went smoothly, but we were delayed taking off. We were half an hour late taking off from london. But once in the air we were fine. Not sure why the delay taking off. My sister picked us up at the airport. I’m very glad to be back home. I’m glad the funeral is over. I’m also glad that I am not around alcohol and my aunt. She has been constantly drinking during the whole time we’ve been there. Its been super hard to cope with. All I could do was take myself out of the room when she started to get too much for me to cope with. She repeats herself a lot when she’s drunk. Its annoying. So all I could do was go. Go upstairs to the bedroom and go on my computer. I had a long chat with one of her daughters today. She told me they’ll be keeping a close eye on their mom. They’ll have to. She’s really bad. I’m afraid she is going to go downhill. She’s not eating, a few bites here and there but nothing substantial. I dont think her organs are going to take the amount of alcohol she’s drinking. I think she is going to become really ill and probably really fast too. I just hope she’ll be ok. I’m worried for her. But we’re safe, we’re home and we’re safe. And Nitro was so happy to see me! He wagged his tail and licked me to death! He was super excited!