Fowc: My partner

I havent talked to my partner jess in weeks. I wish I could. I have tried calling her. But the facility she’s at they dont seem to answer the phone. I guess I’ll just have to keep on trying until someone answers it. I get disheartened though. I’m sure she thinks I dont care, or I cant be bothered to call. Nothing is further from the truth. I miss her so much. I miss all of their system. Its hard though when she’s in that residential facility. Things have changed so much, our relationship has changed so much. She’s been there almost 5 years now. 5 long years. Thats a long time. And honestly? I dont know if she’s ever coming out of there. I just dont know. She doesnt know either. Part of me thinks she wont. Its very tough to see her be in there. Our kids dont understand why their mommy, because jess was a mom to them, they just dont understand why they cant see her, talk to her, hear her read to them. Its heartbreaking. I hope we get to talk soon. I just miss our long talks, where we’d put the world to rights. Our deep conversations. I miss those.


I spoke to my partner

After a month or so without talking to her, we finally got to talk on skype. Well I called her. She’s ok, but she was having a lot of trouble with her words, I think it was due to her meds, she couldn’t quite say what she wanted to say to me, she was having a lot of trouble stringing sentences together.
For those who aren’t aware, my partner jess, lives in a psychiatric residential unit, she’s been there since 2015. I am so sad that she has to be there. She was meant to be going on a home visit this weekend but her mom got sick so she couldn’t go. She was quite upset about it when we talked.
She was delighted I called her though. It was so good to talk to her. I miss her so much. I think of her every day. I would anyway, but well she thought I didn’t. I told her I do. I wake up, and i think of her. I wonder how she is, what she’s doing etc.
I told her to go switch on her phone and we can text. Her phone wasn’t working for a while. It is now again though. So if she switches it on we can text and facetime using our phones. That will be good.
I’m happy now. I can go to bed happy tonight.

#JusJoJan for jan. 7th prompt memento

Your JusJoJan prompt for jan. 7th is thanks to tara, it is, the word memento!

Here are the rules:

1. Please be sure to link back to THIS POST for January 7th, 2019.

2. Just Jot It January starts January 1st, but its never too late to join in! Here, we run on the honour system; the jot it part of JusJoJan means that anything you jot down, anywhere (it doesnt have to be a post, it can even be a grocery list) counts as a jot. If it makes it to your blog that day, great! If it waits a week to get from a sticky note to your screen, no problem!

3. Ill post prompts at 2am my time (GMT -5). You dont have to follow the prompt every day, but that will be where you leave your link for others to see. Youll get a prompt for every day except Wednesday, when the prompt is simply my One-Liner Wednesday and on Saturday, when your prompt will be the Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS, which will appear at about 9:30am Friday. Each prompt post will include the rules. To ping back, just copy the URL from the daily prompt post, and paste it anywhere in your post. Check to make sure your link shows up where you want it to, and go back occasionally to see other bloggers entries the more you visit others, the more theyll visit you! Note: The newest pingbacks will be at the top of the comments section.

4. Tag your post JusJoJan and/or #JusJoJan.

5. Write anything! Any length will do! It can even be a photo or a drawing youre going to title it, right? Theres your jot!

6. The prompts will appear every day thats neither a Wednesday nor a SaturdaySaturdays JusJoJan prompt will be Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Youll find the list of prompts below. Remember, you dont have to use the prompts. Please write whatever inspires you. NOTE: Please state either in your title or very early on in your post if its NSFW.

7. If youd like to, use the JusJoJan badge so that others can find your post more easily.

8. Have fun!


Memento? Whats that? I am sad to say I dont know what it means! I am too damn lazy to look it up, maybe I’ll ask alexa, hang on, hold that thought, I’ll go do that and see if the A lady knows what memento means!

Well, she told me that memento is a reminder of past events! Really? It is?

Ok then! Here is my memento!

Tonight, as I am sitting here drinking my cinamon tea, I am reminded of a trip I took to the USA some years ago, to visit my partner, remembering this trip brings me joy, but also leaves me sad, as now my partner is in a residential psych facility and I havent seen her in four years, I remember us sitting together, drinking hot tea, chatting up a storm, talking into the early hours of the morning. Such happy times they were!

Well guys, thats my JusJoJan for today!


My partner!

i cant sleep. i’ve been thinking about my partner jess, whose currently residing in a psychiatric residential facility, a long term care facility. she’s been there for a couple of years. and i havent heard from her in a few months. so i decided to call her tonight. i couldnt reach her on the residents phone line. so i rang the main reception and the person who took my call said that they were cleaning the dining room right now so she told me to call back in 30 minutes. so i will. i really would like to talk to her and check up on her and make sure she’s ok. i miss her tons lately. its so hard not talking to her on a regular basis. like we used to. we used to talk every day numerous times a day when she wasnt in the psych facility, we’d spend hours on the phone or we’d email a lot back and forth to one antoher. i hope she doesnt think i dont think of her or that i dont care. i do care very much. its just so hard. so hard when half the time the residents phone isnt answered. hoping i can get through to her in a little while. fingers crossed. I’ll be so happy if i do.
carol anne



I’m sitting here
wondering in fear
is something wrong
cant get in touch
havent spoken to you much in weeks
when this sort of thing happens
its not a good sign
tried to call
tried to text
with no success
wondering, are you ok?
or is it just another day
in the life
of someone
in a psych residential facility?

wrote this because I am thinking about my partner tonight, i cant get through to her, lately. I’ve called and texted a number of times, she’s currently in a residential psych facility in the USA.
I hope she’s ok…hoping nothings wrong…

Sunday morning

Happy sunday everyone! I am having a good weekend. i slept well last night. i actually slept a lot of yesterday. i guess i was tired and needed the sleep.
mom and my sister and her kids went to a christmas market, I didnt go with them. I had planned to but at the last minute I decided I wouldnt go.
I will however go shopping today for a few last minute christmas presents for my sister. I enjoy the christmas atmosphere and I love shopping in fact its a favourite thing of mine to do!
I am also feeling very happy this weekend because my partner Jess now has an Iphone! And we can text and talk to one another again!
This is awesome. Its just been too long since we’ve been able to talk to one another frequently!
Not to mention I get to talk to the kids in her system too, my kids!
So yeah feeling so happy this morning!
carol anne