Morning fun

How many telemarketers does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but he has to do it while you are eating dinner.

How many egomaniacs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. The egomaniac holds the light bulb while the world revolves around him.

How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing, it was on the house.

What do you call a steak that’s been knighted by the queen? Sir Loin

If you arrest a mime, do you have to tell him he has the right to remain silent?

Why did the rooster cross the road? To prove he wasn’t a chicken

Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.

What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backward? A receding hare line.

Where does a winemaker get his gossip? Through the grapevine

Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? Because he was stuffed.