so i just finished cathy glass’s new book called nobodys son. what a fabulous read. i was very moved and i would highly recommend this book to people.
this book tells alex’s story. alex was 7 when he came to live with cathy. he had been born to a drug dependent mother, and had been born in prison. taken into care at 18 months, he had been moved around a lot, had numerous carers. when he first came to cathy he was coming temporarily, as he was due to move to his adoptive family soon so he was only going to be with cathy for a few weeks.
a suitable adoptive family had been found for him. they were a very well to do family, had one son, a year older than alex. they were successful business people, and it was felt they would give alex lots of opportunities, for instance, to learn a musical instrament, go bike riding and horse riding. the initial introductions went well. and 2 weeks after being introduced to his family alex moved in with them.
however the placement broke down within days. the adoptive parents felt they’d made a huge mistake. they felt that james their son would be happier as an only child, they felt they shouldnt have adopted. so alex was taken back into care and moved back to cathy.
it was felt that a long term foster family was what he needed now, and so the family finders went about trying to find one. eventually they did find a family. however before that alex had a lot of angry outbursts, and had a lot of acting out behaviours, like running away, he also had bedwetting. it was all due to the trauma of the failed adoption.
eventually a new family was found. and alex was introduced to them. he moved in with them and flourished. for six years he thrived. with love and patience and firm boundaries he settled in well and was doing really well. then when he was 13 he started to rebel.
he was drinking and taking drugs, smoking, truanting, and having severe anger outbursts. his parents who were fostering him long term had adopted him a couple years previously. they were trying to come to terms with the problems he was having. they were really struggling to cope and almost gave up on him. however they did not give up. they kept loving him despite all the difficulties, and eventually he turned a corner. the book ends on a happy note. however it really does put the whole adoption process and matching process for adopting into question. the first adoption failed because the couple werent properly vetted, and the fact that they were not suitable wasnt picked up. i think all foster parents, adoptive parents, carers, social workers should read this book. cathy has done a great job of telling alex’s story. parts of the book moved me to tears. i hope you read this book. it is available on audible, in paperback and on kindle. its a page turner and once you start reading it you wont be able to put it down.