Wishing

Is it wrong to wish that my mom does have a blockage?
I wish she does, because if she doesnt, it means her COPD is at stage four, which is the final stage of COPD!
I dont want her to die!
I am so hoping its a blockage, because, thats fixable.
They can fix it and she can go on to lead a better life than she has right now.
I am so nervous just in case her COPD has progressed to stage four. I feel so anxious and I am headed for a crisis if that is the case.
I just cant lose her! I need my mom!
I need her support!
The thought of anything happening to her is terrifying!
Hoping for a miracle!