WELL CRAPOLA

THIS IS A SUCKFEST OF A NIGHT.
I SHOULD BE ASLEEP, ITS ALMOST 2 AM
INSTEAD I AM UP RUMINATING
I AM OVERTHINKING AND PANICKING AND ANXIOUS AND FEARFUL
ITS HORRIBLE
I MADE MYSELF SOME COFFEE, PROB NOT THE BEST IDEA BUT OH WELL IT IS WHAT IT IS
I NEED COFFEE I NEED TO CALM DOWN AND COFFEE HELPS ME CALM DOWN
PANIC IS RINNING RAMPANT THROUGH THE SYSTEM
I WROTE EILEEN AN EMAIL TO TELL HER WHAT IS GOING ON
I THINK ITS TO DO WITH MEMORIES AND BEING SCARED TO SLEEP FOR FEAR OF NIGHTMARES
WE TOOK OUR MEDS EARLY AND ALL HOPING FOR A GOOD NIGHT OF DECENT SLEEP
GOD HAVING DID IS A SUCKFEST SOMETIMES
LIZ

Advertisements

Eased into monday

i’m starting to love monday. i get eased into class. after a hard therapy session most mondays thats awesome.
this afternoon we watched this documentary about your data and who has rights to your data when you post stuff online. it was fascinating. very very interesting. i never had really thought much about it until this afternoon. in the documenary this girl hired a security analyst to see what he could find out about her from things she’d posted online to her social media. he was able to find out lots of stuff, like, where she lived, where she worked, went to college, how much she payed for her house, etc. it was quite scary.
class ended at 3 and then i just chilled out for the rest of the afternoon.
tomorrow we are going to visit a call centre. it should be an interesting visit to see how a call centre operates as I’ve never been in one.
we arent cooking tomorrow. but on friday we are making spaghetti bolones and i am making apple crumble again because i want to practice it.
on thursday we are having a coffee morning for past pupils of the ILS course. we have those once a month. there is also an awards ceremony for some of the people on the course, as they are graduating it will be finishing up in 3 weeks time.
i still have to complete my work experience diary for last week. its one of only two things left on my goals list to achieve today. the other is reading, and I will do that in bed tonight.

could not keep my eyes open…

so last night I went to bed at about 11. I literally couldnt keep my eyes open any longer.
I was falling asleep at the computer!
So off I went to bed. And I slept like a log!
Joy! I actually got a great nights sleep! Its now 6 AM and I just woke up. I made myself tea and I am now catching up on blogs.
And I feel gooood!
I listened to my body and it feels wonderful!
I really need to do that more often!
Do you listen to your body when its trying to tell you something?
Did you sleep well last night?

Prayers neded

hi guys
if you pray can you please pray for my cousin, he’s a heroin addict and last night he was found unresponsive having overdosed on heroin.
he was rushed to hospital and the overdose was reversed. i am not sure how he’s doing now. a taxi driver found him on the street.
He is the cousin whose mom died of cancer a couple weeks back.
carol anne

run around tuesday

omg i have had the busiest of days! i literally havent stopped all day.

this morning we did digital media, the rest of the class are all way ahead of me, so this morning our tutor gave me a bunch of exercises to do so i could catch up to the rest of the class. i found them pretty easy, it was mostly common sense, very straightforward, all i had to do was read the notes and then answer questions on them.

after small break we cooked, we made vegetable soup and chicken caesar raps, i will post pics in a separate post. we ate the soup and raps for lunch, it was delicious. who knew butternut squash would be good in soup!

after lunch i went volunteering at cork city partnership. when i got there my supervisor was out of the office, and the girl i normally work alongside was out at a meeting, there were a couple other staff there but they were all busy, so i literally was on my own in reception for about an hour and a half. it was quiet though which was good. the only thing was it was so quiet that i was falling asleep, my eyes were literally closing and i was having a hard time concentrating.

trish, the girl who works alongside me came back at about 3:30 and she made me a coffee. she said i could go at 4:30 but i said i wouldnt, that i’d stay until 5 pm. we had a bit of a catch up over our coffees. then trish went to type up some minutes in another office and i stayed on the phones.

at 5 pm i went to mom and dads for dinner. i enjoyed dinner. i also had to change my outfit because i’d spilled all soup down the front of my top, because i am a disaster when it comes to food and spillages. after i’d eaten i was able to sit and relax for half an hour, talk to mom and dad and watch a little tv, before i had to get ready to leave again.

i had college tonight from 7 pm until 10 pm. the class tonight was so interesting. in our addictions module we learned how drugs effect the brain, the changes that occur in the brain when you take a substance, it was fascinating stuff.

the taxi was a couple of minutes late picking me up after class, but it was ok, the caretaker waited with me. when the taxi did finally pick me up he said he had passengers in his car who were drunk and wouldnt get out of the car. so at least he had a good excuse for being late.

now i’m back in abode, flat out exhausted, and wondering if i’ll be able to sleep tonight. i’ve taken my night meds, had a cup of tea and a yogurt, let nitro out, and now i’m sitting here on the couch surfing the net.

i’m happy with how my day has gone. tuesdays are long, but very productive