Well so much for getting up early and going to college. I got up at 7:30, I had set my alarm and when it went off I dutifully got up. I got ready,showered, dressed, all ready to go. Then at 9 AM my friend called me. I was due to meet her outside the college at 10. She called to say she wouldnt be able to come in today. She wasnt able to make it, something came up. I dont really trust anyone else in my class to help me get around, as I dont know them well yet. So I am not going in either. It was a WRAP training, so an elective module, not one that we have to complete, so it really doesnt matter if I miss it.
So now that I am not going in, I will go grocery shopping with my mom instead. I was going to do it tomorrow, my sister was going to take me. But now we can walk to the grocery store today, and I can get my exercise in at the same time, so, win win!
Happy Saturday everyone!
“When you come out of the grips of a depression there is an incredible relief, but not one you feel allowed to celebrate. Instead, the feeling of victory is replaced with anxiety that it will happen again, and with shame and vulnerability when you see how your illness affected your family, your work, everything left untouched while you struggled to survive. We come back to life thinner, paler, weaker … but as survivors. Survivors who don’t get pats on the back from coworkers who congratulate them on making it. Survivors who wake to more work than before because their friends and family are exhausted from helping them fight a battle they may not even understand. I hope to one day see a sea of people all wearing silver ribbons as a sign that they understand the secret battle, and as a celebration of the victories made each day as we individually pull ourselves up out of our foxholes to see our scars heal, and to remember what the sun looks like.”
― Jenny Lawson, Furiously Happy: A Funny Book About Horrible Things
Yes I overthink, but I also over-love.
I lie about being sick sometimes, because people understand if you have a cold, but not if you have depression.
Please don’t judge people. You don’t know what it took someone to get out of bed, look and feel presentable as possible and face the day. You never truly know the daily struggles of others.
But its my own fault. I napped earlier for hours. Im not sure how long for exactly, maybe 3 or four hours in total though.
I doubt I get much sleep tonight. Its now almost 10 PM. I’m wide awake. I think Im in for a long one tonight. A long night where I am wide awake and just thinking. Ug.
Oh well. I have the radio and the tv for company. And there’s always my book if I feel like concentrating on it. For now though I am going to read blogs and email. Try to catch up as I am way behind.
At least I dont have too much to do tomorrow. Besides volunteering I have nothing else on. So if all comes to all and I dont sleep until the early morning hours, then thats ok as I can rest until late morning tomorrow.
Guess what? I have good news!
I got a place on the mental health in the community college course. I am beyond thrilled! I just found out, so you all are the first to know!
It starts next week, next Wednesday. I am so excited! I cannot believe I aced the interview and got a place! I thought it went well but I did not want to get my hopes up too much!
Thanks everyone for all of the good vibes, encouragement, and prayers that I’d be successful!
Your all amazing and I am so grateful for all your kind comments and thoughts!
This is gonna be fabulous! I am really going to throw myself into it! I cant wait to start!
This is a great end to an already fab day!