I am feeling very alone tonight. Its 1:30 AM. I cant sleep. I am alone here in the house as I live on my own. I wish someone was here to talk to. I feel lonely and overwhelmed and so very alone.
I have the radio on for company. I was cold so I put on my heating. I made a coffee as I am not going to sleep. I tried reading, it didnt help. I tried settling down after reading, I couldnt. I just feel wired.
This sucks. If anyone is around, send me a hug or some support please.
I could really use it.

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The crap feeling continues

Well, I still am feeling really bad this morning. I ended up going to bed at 7 Pm last night. I read my book for a while, cuddled with nitro, and then went to sleep. Surprisingly I did sleep. I slept well and didn’t wake until 8 this morning.

Despite everything I decided I am still going to go volunteering today. I need to be out of the house. Going is going to help me I think. Helping others distracts me from my own thoughts. And it feels good to actually be helping others.

My supervisor is going to pick me up at 1:30 this afternoon.

I just wish my mood would lift a little. I really am feeling awful. I feel tense, anxious, and overwhelmed.

Its a horrible place to be in. Thanks to everyone for all of the support. Your all amazing and I truly appreciate it.

Anyone lend an ear?

Anyone around?

I could use a friend, and a little bit of support.

I feel like crap. I am not ok. Negative thoughts are running rampant in my head.

Its not good. All the whatifs keep running around ug sigh!

I am not having a good evening!

I feel so depressed. Last night one of our kids, lexi, was feeling like self harming. She didn’t, thank god! But she was struggling so much and she ended up emailing Eileen.

I think this depression is partly down to the time of year.

I felt ok at work earlier, don’t know why it changed! All I can think is how absolutely shit this feeling is.

If anyone is around please can you send me a bit of encouragement! I could use it!

1liner wednesday

Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you cry alone.

Someone said that to me today. In response to me saying I felt unstable.

Seems a rather odd thing to say, but on reflection its so true. And that my friends is more than one line, but oh well. It is what it is.


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Clutching at straws

I clutch at straws. I am fine, I tell myself. I will be fine.
Do I believe it? Hell no.
Emotionally I am unwell, unstable, very, very much so.
I clutch at straws in the hopes it will all be ok, and I will get through it. Really though? I am unsure.
But it helps to try to remember, I’ve gotten through this before. I have made it out the other side in the past. This too shall pass, that is going to be my new motto.
And just for today, I will be kind to myself. I will do some self care. I will work on remembering to breathe, I will smile and I will say to myself, I am a survivor.
Always keep fighting! ❤


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