I slept well again last night! I think the meds are working! I take haldol now at night, along with prazosin, and epilim and keppra, and meds for diabetes, which I dont have but my doctor refuses to let me come off of them!
I think the prazosin and haldol are helping me sleep much better! After two nights of taking them I am feeling the difference already! I love it! It doesnt take me long to fall asleep once I take them! I read my book last night for an hour, then I settled in and was able to fall asleep quickly!
I slept from around midnight until 6:30 AM! Unheard of for me mostly!
So now I am well rested! And I am feeling good! My mood is a little brighter too!
Its raining here, raining hard. I was going to go to my friends house today in the afternoon but now I’m thinking I wont go. My mom is coming home from her camping trip today, this afternoon.
I think I will just spend another day relaxing, and enjoy the rest of my weekend, before another busy week ahead.
I knew dad and me wouldnt see eye to eye for the whole weekend!
I wanted to have a shower before bed, he said I couldnt. I know I should have just gone ahead and did what I wanted, but he yelled at me about it, and made me feel upset. He said why was I wanting to shower so late, it was only 9 PM though.
I didnt see what the problem was!
Then when I went to make myself some tea he said he didnt want me making any more tea. I think he’s such a control freak. He likes to have the control in every single situation! Its so annoying!
I rang mom and I complained to her, but I dont want to ruin her trip! She told me to just stay in my bedroom and wait until the morning to shower when he’s in a better mood.
So thats what I am going to have to do!
Ug sigh this sucks!
So I was going to go to my friend Normas house this afternoon. I had planned on it but then at the last minute, I decided that the weather was too bad, so I decided I’d wait until tomorrow to go visit her. Instead, I layed down and rested in the afternoon after dad and I had dinner. I rested for about 3 hours. I woke up all confused. I thought it was night time! It was only 6:30 PM though! Has that ever happened to you that you thought it was a later time than it actually was? I am glad I got some rest. I must have needed it as I slept soundly. It was nice and it felt good. I talked to my mom again on the phone, they are enjoying their trip a lot. When I talked to her she was having dinner, and today herself and my sister went on two long walks around lakes that are nearby their campsite. So that’s my mini update. Nothing else planned this evening, other than reading my new book, which so far is really good.
I am feeling good this morning. I feel good because I was able to go back to sleep, even though I woke up at 5 AM! I only stayed up for half an hour, then I went back to bed, and I slept until 9 AM! Yay! Sleeping in was good! It felt nice to be able to do that!
I had a nice breakfast and am now just messing around online, on twitter, reading blogs, I made coffee, it is delicious!
Life feels good! And I got trhough the summer solstice too so yay! I managed to get through it in one piece! For that, I am so grateful!
I talked to my mom this morning, she said it hasn’t rained yet at the campsite, I’d say we’ll have some rain later on today though, as its very cloudy outside and the sky looks dark too.
Mom is enjoying her trip. She said if it doesn’t rain she’s going to go walking this morning.
My friend Norma rang me, she is in a good mood. She just rang for a chat. Its nice to have friends who do that. I am so glad I do.
I have no plans today, just going to chill, relax, just do nothing, enjoy my free time. May have a bath later, for some self care, may read, I started a new book, just a child by Sammy woodhouse. Its good. I am on chapter 3 now.
Mom and my sister have gone camping for the weekend. I didnt go. Camping isnt really my thing. I dont think I’d enjoy it. I think I’d be too nervous about insects, and about eating outside and sleeping outside.
But they’ve gone, and I hope they’ll have fun. The weather doesnt look too good though. Its supposed to rain tomorrow and sunday, all day and evening. They’ve gone to a campsite with some of my sisters partners family.
So its just me and my dad for the weekend. I just got here an hour ago. We’ve eaten, and now I’m just doing my own thing, relaxing in the bedroom while dad watches tv.He’s in a pretty good mood which is good. He’s easier to get along with when he’s not being whiny or a control freak.
I had an amazing apt with dr. barry yesterday. I got there and I was expecting to be waiting about an hour to see her. but within 5 mins of getting there she came out to get me. She said she’s reorganised the clinic, so that people have not got a long wait time, she said she doesnt know how long she can make it work, but for now its working so that is good.
We went in to her office and I told her how depressed I’ve been. We talked about my mood and about this week being the summer solstace. I told her Eileen had offered to check in with us as much as we need to this week as she knows we’ve been struggling so much. Dr. Barry said that was a good thing.
She decided to put me on haldol longterm. 5 MG at night. She said she’d also increase my prazosin, I am on 3 MG at the moment, she said she needs to do some more reading up on it before we increase it, so for now I am to stay on 3 MG for another month. She thinks the prazosin will help my ptsd longterm, it has been helpful, so I am hoping it will lessen my nightmares.
We’re also going to increase my prozac next month from 20 MG to 40 MG.
Basically the majority of our conversation was about meds. I did tell her that I wouldnt be taking up the employment initiative that the national council for the blind was doing, I said I had a change of heart about it since there was no guarantee of a work placement at the end of it. This means that I can now see her again in the mornings, which is going to be better as usually by the late afternoon I’m exhausted.
We scheduled another apt for two weeks time. I really hope putting me on haldol is going to be helpful. I’m already on one antipsychotic, trevicta, which is a 3 monthly shot, so adding another one was risky, but she said since I’ve been on it before she was ok with prescribing it for me.
She gave me an emergency prescription and its being delivered to me tomorrow so I can take the meds over the weekend and see how I go with being on them.
Wish me luck!
So we were going to stay home today, but then we decided that we’d go to the basement club for a few hours. Our friend Norma is picking us up this morning at 10. We’ll go spend about 3 hours at the basement club, then come back to normas house for a few hours. I think it will be good for us to get out and about. Plus now that our college work is done, we dont have to worry about that. So it will be good for our depression to go spend time with other people. I am feeling pretty good right now. Its a nice day out too which is cool. The sun is shining. Always makes me feel more positive when the sun shines. I didnt sleep much but I have had my coffee this morning so the tired feelings have gone away for now at least. Looking forward to hanging out with my friend after spending time at the basement club also. It will be nice to catch up with her.