Recipe of the day. Fresh strawberry bread

Fresh Strawberry Bread
1 pint fresh strawberries
1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1/4 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
3/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1 cup sugar
1/3 cup shortening
2 eggs
1/4 teaspoon vanilla
1/3 cup water
1/2 cup chopped walnuts
Cream cheese, optional
Crush enough berries to measure 1 cup; pour into saucepan and heat to boiling. Cook for 1 minute, stirring constantly; cool. Slice remaining strawberries; chill. Combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt and cinnamon; set aside. Cream together sugar, shortening, eggs and vanilla until light and fluffy; add dry ingredients alternately with water. Stir in crushed strawberries. Fold in walnuts. Spread batter into greased 9 by 5 by 3 inch loaf pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 50 to 60 minutes; cool for 10 minutes before removing from pan. To serve; slice, spread with cream cheese and top with reserved sliced strawberries.

Guest blogger Eve Adams from Revenge of eve tells her story

Today we have a guest blogger, Eve Adams, from revenge of eve.
Check out eves blog at
http://revengeofeveforeveranonymous.wordpress.com/
Below eve shares her story of what it was like to be an alcoholic, now in recovery, Eve tells us what recovery is like also.

Eve writes…

Under the pseudonym Eve Adams, I write anonymously to express my deepest emotions. Blogging is a secret life and for that reason, I enjoy every moment of it. The mystery it creates allows me free range of speech and for this stage of my life, it seems necessary. I am not ashamed of any lessons that life has taught me through mistakes but privacy is key for me. Through this experience, I have learned to set boundaries by breaking my own. I am sharing my true self and at times this is difficult to do behind a mask. Often I feel like an imposter.

I am Eve, a sober bartender in recovery from alcohol. Yes, you read that right. This month,

April 2018, I will have three years sober.

In the beginning, I worked the graveyard shift at Denny’s. They are a 24-hour establishment that does not serve alcohol. Let me be honest, this is the type of restaurant where servers retire! Lol.. Prior to here, I had an extensive career as a fast-paced bartender in local nightclubs so the difference between the two places isn’t comparable. With that said, part of me was dying with my sobriety, a huge part. I can honestly say that I never thought I would step behind the bar again.

A brief history of what my alcoholism looked like. I was living in a town three hours away from home trying to get sober. Living out of my truck, to be exact, because I was kicked out of many sober living homes. I would sleep and drink in the Walmart parking lot. I did so I would be seen by cameras if something were to happen to me. I did this for about three months until I realized I wasn’t getting sober. I was unemployed for two years at this point, consuming a gallon of vodka a day. I made a trip home to spend my daughters spring break with her. It was here I promised my mother I wouldn’t drink and she gave me yet another chance.

I would go on to getting my job at the 24-hour restaurant and secretly I was drinking. This went on for a year before finally, my daughter said she had enough. I wasn’t hiding it as well as I had thought. I haven’t had a drink since that day, three years ago. I had tried everything. I completed six rehabs along with three mental institution stays, they didn’t work. I should be honest and say I didn’t put in the work. I would be employed at the “graveyard” for a year and a half before moving on to a restaurant that served alcohol. I wasn’t the bartender but I did have to make the drinks for my tables. They didn’t have a morning bartender. I worked here for six months before returning to my job at the casino, serving alcohol.

It was a concern for a few but not for me. I knew that I could not have a drink. It will ruin my life, I have the proof, the medal, and the trophy! I had not one desire to drink so when the position came available to work at a full-service bar, I jumped on it. During my interview, I informed the owner of my drinking history telling him if I had one temptation, I would leave. I value my sobriety.

Suddenly I began to feel life again. The part that was missing was in my career. I never imagined myself to be behind a bar again much less sober. There has been one instance that my anxiety was high and I imagined myself taking a shot. In that very moment, I stepped outside and debated leaving but I stayed because I am strong, not stronger than my disease but strong in my sobriety. I remained outside for a few before shaking it off and walking back in. I have been maintaining two jobs since October 2017 and I am happy to report, sober.

My struggle with being an alcoholic has been minimal. It was getting sober that was the hard part for me, remaining sober hasn’t been easy but doable. I find myself enjoying the simple things in life instead of taking them for granted. Today I am medicated for bipolar. I am a different person from who I once was. I now have patience, compassion, and understanding that others struggle too. I am no longer angry or debate every conversation had. I must admit this is the life I have dreamed of and it is mine. Sober. Positive and truly happy!

Book review:A long way from home by Cathy glass

So I just finished the book a long way from home by Cathy Glass. A wonderful read. Different from most of her other foster care memoirs, this is Annas story. A story about a little girl adopted from an orphanage who came into foster care after being diagnosed with reactive attachment disorder and when her behaviour became unmanageable for her parents.
I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It was a poignant read. Deeply moving, very sad in places, but also full of hope.
The summary for the book follows.

The true story of two-year-old Anna, abandoned by her natural parents, left alone in a neglected orphanage.

Elaine and Ian had travelled halfway round the world to adopt little Anna. She couldn’t have been more wanted, loved and cherished. So why was she now in foster care and living with me? It didn’t make sense.

Until I learned what had happened…

Dressed only in nappies and ragged T-shirts, the children were incarcerated in their cots. Their large eyes stared out blankly from emaciated faces. Some were obviously disabled, others not, but all were badly undernourished. Flies circled around the broken ceiling fans and buzzed against the grids covering the windows. The only toys were a few balls and a handful of building bricks, but no child played with them. The silence was deafening and unnatural. Not one of the 30 or so infants cried, let alone spoke.

This book can be gotten from audible, its also available on kindle. and in paperback. It is Cathy glass’s latest foster care memoir.

Woke up sick but…

so i woke up feeling like crap. my head was pounding and my nose was all stuffed up. i was thinking about not going to the ILS course this week. but then i decided i’d just suck it up and go.
i took two panadol which helped matters. after a little while i ate breakfast and my head stopped pounding. i am still not really able to breathe properly and i still feel very off but im just pushing on through.
i just got here to the ILS course about 20 minutes ago. i took my bags to my apartment and put away my fruit that I’d bought and let nitro out and now I’m ready to start class.
i have to work on my diary for my work experience module. im the only one in class today. there should be another girl with me but she rarely comes in. to be honest i donno how she gets away with it. she is so unreliable. always missing tons of days.
i hope im not sick for too long. i’ve just gotten over a similar illness. my immune system must be really low because this is about my fourth time this year having this flu type thing.

SO OUR THERAPIST RESPONDED, SHE’S AWESOME

SHE RESPONDED TO ONE OF OUR EMAILS. SHE ALWAYS KNOWS JUST WHEN TO RESPOND. OUR AGREEMENT IS SHE READS THEM AND DOESNT RESPOND, BUT SOMETIMES SHE BREAKS IT AND RESPONDS ANYWAY..LIKE NOW, AND WE LOVE HER FOR IT…
LIZ

Hi All, Just to let you know I have received all the emails, and wanted to respond briefly. I really do get the various reactions and want to honour them. The anger the uncertainty the wanting to connect the wanting perhaps to push me away the curiosity the sense of abandonment the hurt….I have not left you behind I carry you all with me.
By the way I didnt forget about the book, I made a recording of it…but the playback was on slow and couldnt figure out how to rectify that…or send it! We will figure it out together.
Keep well
Eileen