Missing Nitro

I’ve been feeling pretty depressed today. I miss Nitro so much.

When Frances came this morning, she got very upset, she was crying and I was trying to console her.

She feels bad because the day before Nitro died, she took him out for a walk, and on the way back to my house, he slowed down considerably.

She said if she’d have known how sick he was she’d have never taken him out.

I told her she shouldn’t blame herself, because she didn’t know, hell I didn’t know and I was his mommy!

Anyway, we both cried, and hugged each other.

I decided to have Starbucks delivered, so I got a cool lime refresher, and a caramel Frappuccino!

The caramel Frappuccino was really good!

Then for dinner this evening I decided to treat myself to MacDonalds. I got a sweet chili chicken wrap, fries, and an apple pie.

I’m feeling a little better but the house is so quiet.

I had to tell my pharmacy delivery guy that Nitro had passed away this afternoon. He was very sad to hear the news.

Then my old supervisor rang me, she had heard from Frances that Nitro had passed away. She was ringing me to pass on her condolences.

So its been a hard day. I miss my boy. If he was here he’d have been begging me for food when I was eating my dinner.

He was a real beggar, it’s a pure lab trait!

They love their food!

Author: Carol anne

I am in my mid 40's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

28 thoughts on “Missing Nitro”

  1. It sounds like you had a very trying day. Grief is not fun. Especially when you have to console those around you. I’m glad you made it through the day. Try and get a good nights rest. And crying because you are grieving Nitro is normal.

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