Craptastic crapola #FPQ

How are you doing? Seriously, are you okay? Feeling good? Just okay? Not so great? Why do you think you’re feeling the way you are? ~ Fandango’s Provocative Question

Right now I am not feeling ok. In fact I feel like crapola.

I just got off the phone with my therapist. I emailed her with an update earlier. In that email I asked her if she had a few mins to talk.

She called me back and we spent 40 minutes talking to her.

I feel a little loopy if I am being totally honest.

I feel as if I am in a haze, going on autopilot, walking around with my eyes shut.

I keep doing things and then having no recollection of how I actually did them.

Its crazy. I also feel very anxious right now. I popped a Xanax and it seemed to take the edge off of it.

My therapist says we need to do some processing on Monday, fun times.

Physically I guess I feel ok, I am not headachy, I don’t have stomach issues, chest pain, in fact, I don’t have any pain in any part of my body right now…but my mind, it’s a shit show, dark and scary place for me right now.

I’ll be ok though, well what else can I do, I have no choice, I keep fighting, because I am a survivor, and fight is what us survivors do best.

Author: Carol anne

I am 40 years young. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

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