Therapy endings, Attachment stuff

Last week, Eileen canceled our therapy session, because a family member was ill. We didnt know this at the time she canceled, she texted us on the sunday to say she’d have to cancel our session on Monday, that she had to attend to something. She told us not to worry, but of course that was hard for us, and we did worry, we stressed out and were super anxious and worried, our attachment disorder kicked in big time.
I had the biggest meltdown, and the kids and teens were really effected. The teens in particular felt abandoned, and they got angry and defensive.
After I stopped melting down, I emailed eileen, but I didnt email her until the wednesday. Of course she was very understanding, and she emailed back right away. She did tell us why she’d had to cancel, and then we felt bad for having a meltdown and the teens felt bad for being angry at her.
But its a constant thing with us. We always fear the worst. And she hardly ever cancels, so when she did we feared something awful was wrong with her, or that maybe she wasnt going to see us again.
This week in our session on Monday, she helped us to work through some of our abandonment fears, and the attachment issues. She said she totally gets it and she kept saying she was here, and eventually the kids and teens calmed down and the teens were able to talk to her.
We worked through a memory that sparked the meltdown, it was about our very first therapist, attracta. She ended our therapy very abruptly and we never got a chance to have closure, we never had a proper ending, and we never really got over that.
Now we think that Eileen might do that, even though she’s never even attempted to end therapy with us, you’d think after almost 9 years we’d be able to see that she’s not going to do that.
I think it was the last minute cancelation last week, the day before our session, it just sent me into a tailspin.
I’m glad we worked it out though and that we were able to work on the memory with EMDR, to process it.

Author: Carol anne

I am 40 years young. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

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