Riding the crazy train

I feel crazy right now, so, so crazy.
I am having wild anxiety, I mean, off the damn charts anxiety.
Its horrible! I want to scream or cry or punch something!
I cant take this constant feeling of overwhelm!
Someone come shoot me, please.
I only got 3 hours of sleep in the last 48 hours. I know thats bad, I know its not enough.
My mind is racing, my thoughts are too, I am thinking and catastrophising.
Everything feels negative, of course the voices arent helping matters, they are being mean and negative too.
I’m ready to say fuck it and do something destructive, impulsive, something to make myself slow down, and feel something other than complete overwhelm.
Its half past midnight now. I should be in bed. But I’m too wound up. I’m a ball of energy. A manic sort of energy. Manic but I’m not bipolar.
I’m just riding the freakin crazy train!

Author: Carol anne

I am 40 years young. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

6 thoughts on “Riding the crazy train”

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