Merry christmas, Dr. Barry!

I saw Dr. Barry today. It was my last appointment before the end of 2020! We had a good appointment, we had a lot to talk about.
I gave her a christmas card, and she loved it. She thanked me over and over, and said she really appreciated it.
We talked about therapy and I told her we’d had our last session on the 14th and were on a break now until january. I told her Eileen had offered us a phone check in though during christmas, and that she’d said we can continue to email her, and if we need to if things get really bad for us that we can text her and she’ll call us back.
We talked about my dad and about how he’s being so difficult lately, about how he’s really not very well but he’s refusing to go to a doctor, or get any sorta help, dr. barry said it sounded to her like he’s thriving on the attention, and so she encouraged me to tell my mom to just say to him that we know he’s ill, we know he needs a doctor and is refusing to go, so when he’s ready to get help, we’ll be here for him, but until then, we arent having a conversation about his illness.
I also talked to her about the recent chat I’ve had with my mom about my diagnosis, I’m not sure I ever wrote about that, but lately mom has really taken an interest in my diagnosis, and in my mental health in general. I think she was worried that if anything should happen to her that I’d have no support. She was asking me all sorts of questions for example will my mental illness ever be cured, will I always need meds, if I’ll always see a psychiatrist, etc. I told her the truth, I was completely honest with her, and I am glad we had that chat. I am glad she felt able to ask me those questions.
We talked about my sleep. Dr. Barry said she’d prescribe zimovane, at 7.5 mg, for a week, its a sleeping med, she said she’s willing to give it to me to see if it will help get me back into a sleep routine, not sure it will, but I’m willing to try it.
I told her about the bad headaches I’ve been having, how that when I get one I cant function, I literally have to go and lie down and I cant do anything, cant talk to anyone, I literally have to go to sleep until it passes. I’d been taking pain meds, paracetamol, they werent touching the pain. Dr. Barry thinks that the headaches are probably triggered by my lack of sleep. When I told her I was throwing up last week when I had one she got very concerned, and she told me to keep an eye on it and to let her know how the headaches are when I next see her.
We talked about the winter solstace, I love that she realised it was monday and I didnt even have to tell her, she actually asked me if I was very triggered on Monday due to the date, I was so glad she remembered, that led us into a conversation about it.
We also talked about my smear test, and I told her how triggerd I was by that, she completely understood, she said she could well imagine I’d be super triggered, and I told her I’d had severe flashbacks all day after it.
It was a really good appointment, and I’ll see her again on the sixth of January, but I have a phone check in with my CPN sarah tomorrow. And probably will have one next week also.

Author: Carol anne

I am 40 years young. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

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