Feeling so out of it!

We feel so out of it! So so out of control!
I just took our morning meds. We take prozac in the morning, 40 MG of it. I feel like the depressions getting a lot worse. I feel we may need an increase in our prozac or maybe a change of antidepressant altogether.
I am so relieved to be actually seeing Dr. Barry face to face today. As much as I hate leaving my house, as much as I fear it and it is provoking a lot of anxiety in me, I know I need to do it.
I know I need to see Dr. Barry. We need to have a long discussion about all of my symptoms. I know we do. The symptoms have been getting worse and worse lately. Between anxiety, depression, lack of sleep, dissociation, ptsd getting worse, its a real disaster and a big mess.
I have a lot of anxiety this morning. My heart is racing, I am not sure of the reason behind it, but I know I feel really bad. My chest feels tight. My body feels so shaky. I think I am also having body memories, I can feel the sensations in my body, as if the memories are trying to come through.
Its horrible! I feel so overwhelmed also. I hate memories. I hate being so triggered.
2 O’clock wont come quick enough! That is when my appointment is with Dr. Barry!
At least my mom will be here at 12 O’clock. She’s coming over for an hour before I have to leave at 1:15. I am so glad she’s coming over. Having her here will keep me distracted, and maybe I will be able to feel a little better for a little while.
I sure hope so!

Author: Carol anne

I am 40 years young. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

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