Fuck!

So much for going to bed super early. I didn’t. Its now gone 10 Pm, I have so much on my mind, and am so stressed out, that I just know I wont sleep at all tonight. I’ll be lucky to get an hour or two I bet. I am worried for my psychiatrist Dr. Barry. I wish I knew if she was ok. My mind is thinking all sorts since I don’t know why she’s out of work for 2 weeks, my disorganised attachment brain says she’s very ill, or worse, she got covid, and what if she ends up out of work for months? Or even worse than that, what if she’s hospitalised? I know its not my job to look after her, but I care about her, and I worry for her. I am also still worrying about my therapy, and the fight I now have on my hands to try to get more funding, so that I wont have to pay out of pocket for my therapy.

Its a lot to be worried about. I am also trying to settle Nitro down, someone left off fireworks earlier, and he’s very stressed out now, he’s been panting a lot. I put on the radio and its loud, to hopefully drown out any sounds.
So, with all that, there goes my early night!
Should’ve known it was too good to last!

Author: Carol anne

I am 40 years young. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

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