Memories-Grans suicide

When I was 5 years old my granny on my dads side killed herself. Tonight I dreamed about her. The memories keep coming up. I woke up sweating and feeling very sad.

She threw herself in the river.

She was in her sixties, she was suffering from depression, and she drank a lot as well.

I can still remember all the people coming to our house, and I ran in behind the coffee table, because they were all crying, and I was scared.

I remember my mom taking me into another room so I wouldnt have to hear all the comotion, all I heard was she’s dead, she#s dead.

I still feel so scared even now, when I think of it.

She was missing for a few days before her body was found. My dad went out searching for her, I’m not sure who actually found her, but I do know she was threatening to do it for about a week before she actually did it.

I was 5 years old, when I had to deal with a family suicide.

No child should have to deal with that. I couldnt understand it back then, I still dont now.


Author: Carol anne

I am 40 years young. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

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