A hard night for us

Its a hard night for us. Tonight is the summer solstace, well today was. The night is always tough on us. The date is a hard one as a lot happened to us in the boarding school on this day. We got through today ok, but now that its gone 9 PM we’re starting to struggle. Some insiders feel sad, triggered, and are having flashbacks, I’m trying to keep us all safe.
My anxiety is very bad, so I’m going to take a xanax tonight. I am doubtful we’ll sleep. We are too wound up.
I am going to call my friend sarah, we’ll facetime and I’ll be distracted, and hopefully will calm down a little.
Thank goodness I see Dr. Barry tomorrow.
I think I’m also going to read for a while. Focusing on my book will also distract me and keep me busy.
I hate all of the memories.

Virus-free. www.avg.com

Author: Carol anne

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

4 thoughts on “A hard night for us”

  1. I can’t really say much right now except that the symptoms of DID & CPTSD take a long time to fade just as it took a long time to be where you all are at this point. Having your safe toolbox and things to help distract that you were already referring to can definitely help. In my opinion though… One of the best things for me is being patient with myself, having self compassion, and checking in with my mind and body as much as it allows me to. The survivors have a tendency to push ourselves or have way too high expectations which often leads to self sabotage And more triggering, etc.…

    I rarely ever post but sometimes something will catch my attention and then I respond.

    Hang in there

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I haven’t decided yet what I’m going to read next, I just finished overcoming it’s a book about a woman who survived ovarian cancer I have loads of books to choose from so I’m not going to be stuck for reading


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