I CANT DO THIS!

TRIGGER THIS POST TALKS ABOUT DEPRESSED FEELINGS, SUICIDAL THOUGHTS ETC!
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LAST WARNING!
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I CANT DO THIS! I CANT GO ON!
I AM SO DEPRESSED! I FEEL AWFUL! JUST, AWFUL!
ITS NOT BECAUSE OF THIS MORNINGS TEST. I’VE FELT THIS WAY ALL WEEKEND! I DONT KNOW HOW TO FIX IT! I’M AFRAID TO TEXT EILEEN, I MEAN, SHE’S ILL, I CANT BOTHER HER! I COULD, BUT HOW SELFISH IS THAT?
I WONT!
I WANT TO END IT LIFE IS MEANINGLESS AND NOT WORTH LIVING!
I KNOW THE REST OF THE ADULTS DONT FEEL THIS WAY BUT I DO!
I’M JUST SO DEPRESSED! NOTHING SEEMS TO BRING ME OUT OF IT!
ANYONE GOT TIPS FOR ME?
ANYONE EVER FEEL LIKE THIS? I CANT BE ALONE CAN I?
I’M SAFE. DONT WORRY. I’M NOT GONNA DO ANYTHING STUPID! I JUST, I FEEL HOPELESS!
LIZ

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Author: Carol anne

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

16 thoughts on “I CANT DO THIS!”

  1. I am so sorry you feel this way 😦 It will pass though. I know that sounds obvious, but that’s what I have to remind myself when I’m having a moment.
    What makes you feel calm? A hot bath? A yoga session? A comfort movie you’ve watched a thousand times? Whatever it is, I think you should go do that until you feel a little better.
    Give yourself permission to indulge and relax. Whatever is going on can wait. This sounds like a moment when you really need to take care of yourself.
    And if you feel unsafe, call someone right away.
    I hope you feel so much better very soon ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. I will be okay. I’m just feeling a little unsettled and overwhelmed. I think I will go read for a while. I also called my mum to chat with her. XOXO 🥰

      Like

  2. I’mm so sorry you’re struggling, Liz. We can relate, though right now we’re mostly experiencing anxiety rather than depression. I’ll ask our Amy, who is an adult who deals with depression frequently, to talk to you if you want me to.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. You’ve got lots ahead of you, like a trip to Colorado when the whole COVID disaster calms down. Can any of the other adults help give you some support? And I’d say if you feel like you need to reach out to Eileen, do it. A text isn’t an in your face kind of thing, and if she’s not feeling well she can answer it later. xo

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I did, I texted her, she already texted back, she was very kind and said she was thinking of me and I said I was thinking of her and asked her how she was feeling you know because she sick with the shingles, so we kind of helped each other I guess, glad I reached out to her XOXO

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Felt somewhat like that few days back and m glad I took a while to think and convince myself that I will resort to extreme measures when things go really bad.The next morning my children hugged me and said we love u and never give up on us ever..Like they understood what I was thinking of the previous night without me sagi g anything.after spending time with them I was so glad I didn’t do anything stupid
    My point is we all feel the way u feel at some point in our lives.but spending time with loved ones and doing something we really love spending g time in definitely lifts your spirits.
    U r not alone dear.We all are there going through some negative feelings and seeking solace and calmness with our wordpress family here.
    Sending liye of love and hugs to u dear.tc

    Liked by 1 person

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