its me em. and im feeling so sad! im realy struggling!
ive been strugling with not wanting to eat. carol anne says we have to. but i feel so fat! i dont want the food! i just feel huge! like i’m a fat pig! food makes me want to throw up!
we’re suposed to be having stirfry for dinner. chicken stirfry. i gess i’ll have to try to let the others eat it. if i could, i’d just starve! i just dont like food!
can i ask something? those of you who’ve seen photos of us, do you think we’re huge? very fat? i worry we are. i know we’re losing weight, but i still worry, im so afraid to get to fat and what if we get sick and stuff!
and my abusers always told me if i was thin they wouldnt hurt me! they said perfect girls are skinny and i wasnt skinny, i was fat!
do you think they lied? i tried to be perfect but i never could be!
well i gess ill go now. we do got to eat. even if i dont feel up to it. i know the rest of them in here want food!
so glad ill be talking to eileen later! i feel so glad we get to chat with her! we need her reassurance! i do! i need to hear her sootheing and calm voice saying it’ll all be ok!
Emily, age 12