She held me and hugged me

its emily. we had a very hard therapy session today. but something amazing happened during it.

eileen and me were talking, we talked a lot and some of my insiders came out and talked to her as well. we were talking about how people hurt me and punished me and were so mean to me.

eileen said she had an impulse to hug me. she asked me if she can come sit by me and put her arms around me. of course i said yes. cuz well shes my very safe person and i love her hugs.

so she came over and sat next to me and held me. for a long long time. it felt so good to be held.

it felt safe, very very safe. safe and secure. i felt so loved.

we talked as she held me. it was amazing. she asked me how it felt to be held. what it felt like for me. i told her i felt good, warm, and safe.

i asked her if next week she’d sit next to me instead of across the room from me. she said yes she will. i think that will be better for us. she’s sat next to us before, but my insiders and me are doing work with her right now, and i want my insiders to get used to nice touch, safe touch.

i feel much better now. i feel like i can face this week. i will remember what her safe hugs feel like when i am sad. i can remember our hug today, and her safe arms around me.

it feels so good. i feel loved. and that just feels so special.
Butterfly hugs,
Love
Emily age 12

Author: Carol Anne

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

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