Silence is a trigger for us

Laura’s word prompt this week is “Silence”, thanks Laura for the inspiration.

Today in therapy I realised, silence is a huge trigger for us. We were sitting there doing an EMDR exercise, eileen stopped talking for a minute or two. All there was was me, the sound of the vibrating pulsers, and the sound of my own thoughts. And boy did I get triggered! I started to dissociate, float away. I started to disengage. I couldnt hear Eileen. She sounded so far away from me when she eventually did start to talk again. Once I caught it I was able to tell her about the trigger. I was able to tell her that I cant stand silence, I need her to speak while we are doing the EMDR, I need her to keep talking to me. She was ok with doing this for us. I wonder though, what is it about the silence? That part I havent figured out yet. I’m still working on it. I’m happy I was able to figure out though that this is one of our triggers that causes dissociation and spaciness. At least now I know. Now I know and can do something to try to not have that happen.
carol anne


Author: Carol Anne

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

6 thoughts on “Silence is a trigger for us”

  1. Oh really?! I’m not alone! Silence can scare the shit out of me too. My reaction to it is different, I don’t dissociate since dissociation has never been something I’ve experienced, at least as far as I can remember, but silence definitely can be scary. Sometimes very scary. It can be soothing too, it just depends on various circumstances. I am usually not that afraid of silence when I’m with someone, even if we aren’t talking, so I don’t think the situation you described would trigger me, but it often happens that silence is just unbearable and very anxiety provoking for me. But so can be some sounds as well. And I also don’t know why it is so and why it scares me, even though it has been this way for ages. I’m sorry for you that you’ve experienced this shit, but if I’m honest I’m glad there’s someone else having similar stuff to deal with.

    Liked by 1 person

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