FUCKIN HELL

WELL THERE GOES ANOTHER PEACEFUL NIGHT.
DAD GOT ANGRY AND THEN HE WENT OFF TO BED LEAVING MY MOM SITTING ON HER OWN WATCHING TV.
WHY DO WE DO IT? PUT OURSELVES IN THIS SITUATION?
THE SITUATION OF BEING TRIGGERED BY HIS ARGUING AND MOOD SWINGS?
ALL THIS BECAUSE I WAS MAKING TEA, AND HE DIDNT WANT ME TO DO IT, HE WANTED MY MOM TO MAKE IT FOR ME, SHE TOLD HIM I COULD DO IT MYSELF, AND THEN HE WENT OFF ON ONE BECAUSE HE SAID I’D LEAVE THE KITCHEN IN A MESS.
FFS! WHAT THE BLOODY HELL!
OK SO HES BEEN DRINKING, AND IS A LITTLE DRUNK, BUT SO WHAT IF I’D HAVE LEFT THE KITCHEN IN A BIT OF A MESS, WE’D HAVE TAKEN CARE OF IT IN THE MORNING.
TALK ABOUT OCD TRAITS!
EVERYTHING HAS TO BE JUST SO OR ELSE!
I FEEL SORRY FOR MY MOM, SHE HAS TO LIVE WITH THIS ON A CONSTANT BASIS, ON A DAILY BASIS EVEN.
LIZ

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Author: Carol Anne

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

10 thoughts on “FUCKIN HELL”

  1. Hugs. It sounds like he is taking his own issues out on those around him. I know you have said his health is declining. I suspect that is playing into it – and drinking to escape certainly doesn’t help. I’m so sorry for you for having gotten the brunt twice in a row. Get some more of that tea, your rose bottle from Eileen and go do better for the child parts that probably also got scared by the whole episode. Hopefully taking active care of your system will call you down, too.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. YOUR RIGHT. EVERYONE WAS SO SCARED. AND YES HIS HEALTH IS DECLINING, BUT WE’VE TOLD HIM TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT, HE WONT. SO WHAT CAN YOU DO. HE’S SO STUBBORN. ANYWAY. I’LL KEEP TAKING CARE OF ALL OF US, THANKS, HUN XO

      Liked by 1 person

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