wide awake

well I’m wide awake at 3 AM. really, this has gotta stop! i have to get myself back on track. get back into some sorta normal routine. its so hard though. when i’m tired i want to sleep. i dont want to push myself to stay awake until that night. and then i suffer at night if i sleep in the day. its a nightmare. i slept when i was at mom and dads today for four hours. i couldnt keep my eyes open. then i drank a ton of coffee, so yeah, i know where i’m going wrong. its just doing something to fix that…
at least nitros fast asleep. he is comfy and warm, in his bed. so far the weathers holding out. it hasnt snowed. its cold though. but it hasnt gone below freezing. i dont think it will today. i checked on my phone and it looks like the low is going to be 2 degrees c today.
so it does look like we’ll get to therapy after all. what a relief. i am so happy about that. i need to also phone my supervisor in the ILS course today to tell her i wont be in this week.
I plan on doing that first thing. I also plan on going on the treadmill early in the day today. I want to increase my walking time. I’ve been walking 10 minutes a day, i want to increase it to 15 minutes, and up as far as 20 minutes by the end of the week.

Author: Carol Anne

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

25 thoughts on “wide awake”

  1. Hang in there 🙂 not sleeping is so tough. Still takes me an hour or so to go to sleep and sometimes 2 hours to get up and moving. Trying to accept if you are not sleeping is better than trying to fight it in my opinion….. send yourself peace, calm and loving thoughts. ❤

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  2. I’m sorry you had another night of no sleep. I finally slept all the night through and looks like I settled in for now, so hope you will soon too. and I am happy you didn’t have to cancel therapy today.

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