Therapy today

we had a very productive therapy session this morning.

we decided to go through remys report, which I havent yet posted, but will do later tonight. its just a draft report, the final one wont be prepared until we all add our comments to it.

eileen had printed it out and we read through it talking over what was in it. we made notes as we went along.

we ended up stopping and starting a lot because things came up like things about attachment, mom issues, etc. it was me carol anne who did all the talking today. and boy did i need the session.

eileen asked me how i felt about trying to encorporate meditation into my day. so from tomorrow on I will make it one of my daily goals..

the attachment thing, i told her dr. barry says we have attachment disorder. she said that had an effect on her and she didnt like the word disorder. that everyone to some degree has a degree of attachment issues, then we talked about secure and insecure attachment for a little bit.

we talked about my mom and i told eileen i feel dependent on her, and she allows it to happen, and we discussed this at length and i said how I worry in case something will happen to her and then i wont manage by myself, eileen encouraged me to talk to her again and tell her how i am feeling, and ask her to let go a little relincish control a little bit and allow me to do my own thing.

as it is now she’s constantly reminding me to do things, things like did i let nitro out, did i brush my teeth, did i wash dishes, take meds, etc. it gets old, but then i know secretly there are parts who like that she does those things for us.

we talked a little about dr. barry and the spacing out of our apts with her to bi weekly. she asked me how i was doing with that. i didnt lie. i said i found it hard. i said i am finding it hard to get used to it after 4 plus years of weekly apts with her.

it was a very full on session. at the end she told me about a new course she is going to do in body psychotherapy. we then got to talking about books on trama and she asked me if reading them triggered me in any way. i said i dont read them in their entirity that i dip in and out of them.

she’s going to do the symatic therapy course in april. i’ll be interested to see how we can encorporate it in to future sessions. I’m very curious.

i feel drained now after the session. i hope i’ll sleep well tonight. i do have a lot to process after it.

Author: Carol Anne

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

18 thoughts on “Therapy today”

  1. Good for you. You guys all need some good sleep, and especially you, carol anne, after such hard work. I think that alot of time mothers who feel they messed up on some serious issues like their kids getting abused or harmed etc. often try to be very controlling, so that they can feel that at least they do the day-to-day bossing around ‘well’ and that makes them a good mother int heir minds. It can be really hard on the kids. I see this especially in mothers where the kid had such abuse and hard times that they have DID, and yet especially when the mother denies it or denies much of the abuse happened. So hard for everyone.


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