One time i wished I was not a multiple

I REMEMBER ALL THE LITTLE PILLS BEING IN MY HANDS. AROUND 20 OR 30 OF THEM. AS I SWALLOWED THEY GOT STUCK IN MY THROAT.
I KEPT SWALLOWING DESPITE THE NEED TO JUST VOMIT. I HAD TO GET ALL OF THEM DOWN. MY LIFE DEPENDED ON IT.
I WAS GOING TO DIE THAT NIGHT NO MATTER WHAT IT TOOK. I HAD MADE UP MY MIND. THIS WAS GOING TO BE THE END FOR ME
I FELL INTO UNCONSCIOUSNESS AND SOME TIME LATER I AWOKE TO HEAR A FEMALE VOICE. ASKING ME LOTS OF QUESTIONS. EVERYTHING FELT SO FUZZY. BUT I REMEMBER HER CLEARLY SAYING, WHERE IS THE BABY? WHAT BABY? I TRIED TO TELL HER I DID NOT HAVE KIDS. SHE WOULDNT BELIEVE ME. SHE WOULDNT LISTEN. THE BABY? WHERE IS THE BABY?
THE MAN WHO WAS WITH HER TRIED TO GET ME TO TALK ALSO BUT I COULDNT, I JUST WANTED TO CLOSE MY EYES FOREVER. OPEN YOUR EYES, STAY AWAKE, WE’RE GOING TO GET YOU TO THE HOSPITAL SOON.
I PROTESTED, NO, I DONT WANT TO, LEAVE ME HERE, I’LL BE DEAD SOON…BUT NOBODY WAS LISTENING TO ME.
THEY DID GET ME TO THE HOSPITAL THAT NIGHT. I DID LIVE. AND I LATER FOUND OUT THE REASON WHY THEY THOUGHT I HAD A BABY? THEY CAME INTO MY HOUSE, LOOKED AROUND AT ALL THE TOYS, LOOKED AT ME, AND THOUGHT THIS IS WEIRD, THERE MUST BE KIDS LIVING HERE.
THATS ONE TIME WHEN I WISHED I DIDNT HAVE DID. BECAUSE TRYING TO CONVINCE THEM THAT ONLY ME A GROWN ADULT WAS LIVING HERE WAS A COMPLETE NIGHTMARE.

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Author: manyofus1980

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

3 thoughts on “One time i wished I was not a multiple”

  1. Oh my God it sounds like a gross nightmare. Yeah, I believe it had to be almost impossible to convince them that you live alone and don’t have a child, especially that people know so little about DID. Just awful! Hugs! 🙂

    Like

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