No sleep, worry about mom and dad, and waiting for a call from the weekend team

I didnt sleep good last night. I tried and tried, tossed and turned. And nothing. In the end I just layed there for hours, thinking. Thats not good because I start to overthink. Mostly my thoughts were about mom, mom and i talked yesterday some about tomorrow and about what if the news is bad news. Mom was trying to be positive, where as I was trying to be realistic. I am so afraid its going to be bad news. I really dont know what Ill do if it is. How Ill cope I mean. Im so afraid I wont be able to cope. Moms sister is coming with us tomorrow so that is good as it means there is an extra person there to think of questions and to be a support for me and mom. I was also worrying about my dad. He goes for a sigmoidoskopy tomorrow to see if the leesion on his bowel has gotten bigger. He told me this morning hes been awake all night in pain. I am wondering what will happen, if theyll decide to keep him in and operate or what. It really depends I suppose on what they see when they do the scope. I never ended up having the home visit from the weekend team yesterday. I told them I didnt need it, mom wanted me to come be with her and she asked me to tell them not to come out. I called them and talked to them over the phone though. And that was ok and helpful. I am currently waiting for one of the team to call me to se how Im doing. I thought they would have called by now, but they can call at any time of the day so its really a waiting game. I plan on talking a little to them about my anxiety around mom and my worry surrounding that and also around the not sleeping great last night. Im not sure what was going on because I had been up since 5 AM yesterday and I had taken my night meds and everything so you would have thought Id have slept.

Author: manyofus1980

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

4 thoughts on “No sleep, worry about mom and dad, and waiting for a call from the weekend team”

  1. Your insomnia is really getting bothersome. Have you ever had a sleep study done to see if there is any physical reason why you aren’t sleeping well? Continued prayers being said for your mom and dad.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No, I’ve never had a sleep study. I was supposed to a couple of years back. I might see the doctor and ask him about it. Not sure what the problem is but yes it is becoming a real problem for me. XXX


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