IM COPING EVEN AFTER FEELING SUICIDAL

SO I FELT SO CRAPPY LAST NIGHT. I FELT SUICIDAL AND FELT LIKE ENDING IT. ALL OF YOU HAVE BEEN SO SUPPORTIVE TO ME. I REALLY APPRECIATE IT VERY MUCH. YOUR ALL GREAT! NOT LONG AFTER WRITING THE POST WHERE I SAID I FELT LIKE ENDING IT I WENT TO BED. AND I SLEPT FOR HOURS. SO THEN I WOKE AT LIKE 1 AM AND COULDNT GET BACK TO SLEEP FOR THE REST OF THE NIGHT. BUT THE SUICIDAL URGES HAD PASSED. I THINK SOME OF IT MIGHT BE BECAUSE TODAY IS THE START OF SATANIC NEW YEAR, AND THATS A HUGE TRIGGER FOR ME. BECAUSE I AM A SRA SURVIVOR.
I HAD A REALLY PRODUCTIVE MORNING. I AM AT THE BASEMENT CLUB. I DID MY VOLUNTEERING AND GOT LOTS OF WORK DONE. I DO DATA ENTRY AND WRITE A NEWSLETTER EACH MONTH AS WELL AS ANSWERING THE PHONES. TODAY I WROTE THE JANUARY NEWSLETTER. I ALSO DID ALL OF THE SIGN IN SHEETS SINCE THE START OF JANUARY. I FEEL GOOD. ITS GOOD TO BE PRODUCTIVE. AT LEAST IT MAKES ME FEEL GOOD ABOUT MYSELF THAT I CAN GIVE BACK TO THE COMMUNITY. IT ALSO MAKES ME FEEL WORTHWHILE.
CORA

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Author: manyofus1980

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

6 thoughts on “IM COPING EVEN AFTER FEELING SUICIDAL”

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