so its a new day and I feel a lot better in myself. My mood seems to have stabilised. I dont have the suicidal feelings going on. The thoughts of wanting to be dead have disapated. thank goodness I say.
I’ve been awake a lot of the night. My sleep sucks. I doubt there is anything I can do about it. I even had a sleeping tablet last night. The thing is I was exhausted when I went to bed. I couldnt keep my eyes open. But then I woke at 3 AM and have been awake ever since.
It will be breakfast time soon. I need to have a shower this morning. I never had one yesterday because they were short staffed on the unit. I hope someone can assist me this morning. My mom couldnt visit last night. There are restrictions on the ward because of a flu outbreak. So she just had to drop off my clothes to me via the security guard at the door. I was disappointed that I couldnt see her but I understand, with her lungs being how they are she cant afford to catch anything.
I hope today will continue to be a good day. Its positive that I am feeling good now though. I call that a win.