Therapy this week

we had a great therapy session this past monday. we mostly talked about the possibility of me working. we talked about what would need to be put in place so that our having did would not effect our ability to do the job. that if we get the job of course. heres hoping we will…fingers crossed. we discussed me possibly ageing. eileen said she thought i was really reflective and she felt if i wanted to that maybe it would be a good time to try ageing up from 19 to say 21 and go from there, do it slowly over time. i still dont know how i feel about it so i’m waiting a little longer before i make a final decision. we talked about emily, emily is 12 and has been having some issues with throwing up lately. this is because she is scared of change, and so she is trying to control food and how much food we put into our body. eileen is going to work with her next week some more because we cant have her throwing up its just not a good coping skill. liz was out for a while too this past monday. her and eileen talked about the fact that she is feeling low and quite depressed. she liz is struggling with being 16 and having the emotions of a 16 year old but being stuck in the body of a 36 year old. she is finding it tough to be a teen and she is wondering about her purpose now that she rarely cuts and doesnt drink to numb her feelings. eileen told her that she has plenty to offer the system and working together with me we could form a great team. liz still isnt fully convinced though. we are going to work on putting some groundrules in place about switching and when that can happen. i told eileen i want to work on being more in control and not allowing the littles to just switch out when they feel like it as it can be problematic and actually quite dangerous. i need to work on presenting as a competent adult. i keep thinking that people can see some huge differences in us when we are out in the world or talking to outsiders but eileen reassured me that actually no that they dont, that i present as normal and you’d never know i had did or insiders if you werent told. i’m glad about that because if i am to have any chance at this job opportunity i need to be focused and present fluidly and as a competent person. it was a good session though and i feel we got quite a lot accomplished.

Author: manyofus1980

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

6 thoughts on “Therapy this week”

  1. i hope you get the job. It must be so difficult for the littles to realize that they aren’t little anymore and that they are really growing up, not that I fully understand DID, but you present it so well and I think you do a good job describing what goes on so people can understand

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, I try hard to describe it so that people will understand how it feels and how things happen. I hope I get the job too. It would be nice. I’d like to be working and being a peer support worker is something that I am passionate about and would really enjoy


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