Poem…torment ed related

a weight falls heavily upon me
a steady pull inside my brain
in one room i seek love and understanding
in another i perge the guilt and pain
my guilt never leaves
my pain only deepens
my life is a wild rotation from one room to the other
locked in a neverending circle of torment
a game of chess i cannot win
i stand up
throat on fire, head spinning, heart pounding
begging for an end, any end to this hell
i gaze into the mirror wiping my mouth
wondering who i have become
a drawn and pale face
dull expressionless eyes
i run my hands through my hair hoping it will quiet the screams in my head
but it doesnt, and tomorrow the game will start again.

emily age 12

Author: Carol Anne

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

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