triggered and so scared

i am triggered and scared. dont know what to do. want to curl in a ball and just cry. should probably email eileen. dont know what to say to her. my words feel stuck in my throat. wish i had someone to call right now. i’m on emotional overload. my pa will be here in a few hours. everything is swimming around my head. memories, and emotions…all of it it just… well i am just….lost. i feel like i am imploding, fragmenting into bits and pieces. need to try to do something to distract, perhaps a shower would help. it would wash away the pain. everything just feels so raw and so huge and overwhelming. first thing this morning i am going to call eileen. then i will call karen my social worker and get refered to the weekend team. at least they can admit me to the hospital if needs be. could use some support right now.
carol anne


Author: manyofus1980

I am a woman in my mid 30's. I'm blind and I have dissociative identity disorder, I also have complex PTSD. I blog about my life with these disorders. I live in Ireland.

16 thoughts on “triggered and so scared”

  1. I’m not sure about the time difference and what time it is where you are now. I am sorry that you’re struggling and I certainly understand where you’re coming from. A shower would perhaps help and then maybe some of your coping mechanisms? I use colouring, a walk outside, music, a movie, call a friend even (if you’re able at this time), journaling, even spending time with my animals. Not sure if any of these things would work for you but thought I’d mention some. Most of all, please know you’re not alone. Sending loving prayers and warm hugs your way. Take care of you xx

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